I fuckin hate meteorologists (Rants)
submitted by PeckerwoodPerry to Rants 7 months ago
45 comments

First, they're all a bunch of fucking liars. You telling me that we can land a remote controlled robot of fuckin Mars, drive that nigger around taking pictures and drilling holes and shit, but you mother fuckers can't accurately tell me if it's gonna rain tomorrow? Fucking. Bull. Fucking. Shit. I ain't I ain't buying that shits, it's fuckin too expensive. Y'all mother fuckers can control the god damn weather, you can can tell me if it's gonna fuckin rain tomorrow.
Second, and this almost pisses me off more, is the flimsy fuckin language they get away with using. There's not a god damn difference between partly cloudy and partly sunny. Why the two terms? Because they're trying to emotionally manipulate people, and it fuckin works! Another one is chance of rain, fuck chance of rain. They'll tell you that there's a 90% chance of rain and you won't see a fuckin drizzle. What does it even mean? Like, 90% of the area MIGHT get rain? Like there's a 90% chance that it rains for a minute, or it's gonna rain for 90% of the day? Be specific you cunts.
This brings me to my third gripe, arguably the biggest. Storm predictions. Fuck your spaghetti models, cones of probability, and European climate models. You know exactly where the fuck a big storm is gonna hit, just tell those people. Nah, instead what they do is this fear based BROADcasting to get everyone within 200 miles of the Gulf or Atlantic to panic buy beer, plywood, gas, water, and whatever the fuck else their scared minds think they might need if the power goes out for a couple weeks. Meanwhile, BP, Home Depot, and Anheuser Busch are rubbing their hands and licking their lips. It's fuckin sick, if you have never seen someone in the grips of hurricane fear, it is fucking sick.
So yeah, fuck those guys. TL;DR the weather channel is fake news and fuck you too.