Come all ye for creative writing, drunken porch monkey talk, sobriety talk, music, odd and weird historical shit. What have you. From high brow to low brow
I'm grateful for this chair I'm grateful for this pen Ideas seem to disappear But they exist they'll come again
I'm grateful getting older Though I don't feel quite grown up yet I'm grateful still relatable In progression d'effet
I'm grateful for all the drugs I used Lucky didn't get hooked on dope I'm grateful never liked needles But sure there's damage to my nose
I'm grateful I don't gamble much My addictive personality I'm grateful poker's just for fun With bills from Monopoly
I'm grateful unemployment's flagged I'm grateful rehab has few needs Miss my well paying position But if I had cash I'd prolly flee
I'm grateful I'm not stuck in jail And my family sends me smokes I'm grateful to be leaving soon But a halfway house ain't home
I'm grateful blood work's normal And I can't see my liver's size I'm grateful don't have cravings It's been forty days tonight
I'm grateful for lovers and dry spells Though I'm not sure I've been in love I'm grateful for a break from news Still point out programming's propaganda
I'm grateful for the friends I made I'm grateful I'm not dead May not always stay sober But it'd be great to come again
White knuckling Frozen in bed Like the deer and I's staring contest Last I drank in the woods Wires like vines grow over me Smell of onion or vinegar In the parts neglected Even a Marine bath Teeth fuzzy like moss Entropy - waiting for nature to reclaim me In the mysteries of her immortal processes
Days spent longing for darkness If this mattress could sail To the eternal comfort of Alaska
Waves of memories Some chaos some calm Flood my senses Piecing together What feels like parallel lives As the years catch up to me
Guess I always felt old Or wanted to be Still some youthful look Besides a few stray greys
The last of us born Before this Sci Fi world I couldn't wait for - Now it scares the hell out of me And what it holds for those who will inherit The things and things to come We take for granted each day
Why should jealousy, wrath and envy In this state hold me When I know I've already held myself back
I've snowballed into this situation Now to find a place to melt As I've said before I'll climb out of this mess As I always do
Smedley Ex Machina You may become my only offspring
The shape of the floorplan One turn right or wrong Depending where you're coming from Besides hopping off at the junction For a fix at the nurses station We're still riding the L
Some now take different needles Most trade strong drink for coffee All jonesin' for cigarettes Stuck en route on the L
Sunlight ripples on ceilings Peaceful train underwater Show any longshoremen He'd be sure that we'd drown Yet somehow always handed same Big Book That belonged to a Clifton Tremored scribbles on the L
Crusty's back to construction Big Mike's returning to the oil rig Replaced by touchy old hippie And Boston smoking crack in a tree Hope for closure to misunderstandings With the De Lacey's and my Lord And Burroughs Adding Machine Left when El presidente Corey leaves May he not nod off on the L
Scotty answers my call from the landline Closest these kids'll get to a payphone Last we talked at length Before a blind date But what fog made me forget He returned to Pa Same that made her disappear Though we no longer smoke L's
Have I come to regard the majority The same as the elites I despise Useful idiots to be disposed of Maybe I'm booked for the same cattle car Maybe we all ride on the L
Movie night Tim (Ginsberg) pats me on the back Asking if I enjoyed Oppenheimer He knows I know Gary Oldman was good as Truman Just unsympathetic to the real narrative Remeran kicking in I know he knows Does a cigarette perk me up, he asks It's an illusion Calms you down though it's a stimulant Keeps you warm though it slows circulation
Wonder who's wearing goggles To see things as they are Or who's brains been melted Hard to gauge in our state
Chemical floods - pathways restored Sucked into jealousy circles Joy following big John Latoya insults her after she sat with me Don standoffish he can't take the Queen Peer group resents his presidency
Facility near capacity Some of us don't want to return To crumbling castles We're not stuck here like Los Alamos
With cell doors unlocked Try to do the right thing But no one's quite the Apostle Paul Tensions rising Who knows what diabolical plots Are being cooked up (not to become meth) In any of our callous mending minds A village of destroyers of worlds
Constant reminders of what you can't have Not all that different than the outside Yet it still drives you mad Same silly dominant rites But lust could cost you land
Once I swore it all off Then again I took risk Bless this place without cell phones Damn replaced consequence What once was easy gets honed Till the scale tips again
Not sure if I'll surrender But I'll try to resist They're two different problems But the same bloody fists Guilt, shame and solvents Can't tell the difference
Reluctant sigh, stoic patience There's no fooling the eyes Want attention then don't Clocks don't understand time What was wealth before gold And what love does it buy?
Still hesitant getting old Nature's cute warning signs
Guards couldn't find in his nasal cavity A whole gram of meth Still a hardworking honest man Looks way older than 51 Joey P compares him to The old man with a shovel In Home Alone Doesn't know how he caught A stray bullet - 22 ain't nothing to pull When his own brother shot him once A barn mouse will wait on his foot For crumbs of crank Falling asleep recovering From a motorcycle accident Pomeranian licked infection to the bone PTSD from wife's suicide Cleaned up the blood Before the kids could smell iron Good to see him falling in love again Even with Jess Who looks like Rachel Druze from SNL As strange as it is
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