Yep it is what it is. I never thought I would be that guy. Anytime someone talks about suicide I always think that they definitely shouldn't do it but I can't seem to muster the same thought for myself. It's all I can think about now. I'm extraordinarily unhappy. I've never done a single fucking thing in my entire life. I can't focus on anything else enough to work or do any sort of hobbies, it's consuming me
This girl told me that she had just acted as a therapist for this 37 year old girl for 2 hours because this girl had never been in a relationship. I said to her that she should set us up because I'm in the same situation (I'm 37 years old and have never been in a relationship) and this girl said to me quote "Shes not into creepy incels" and then left before I could say anything.
I literally cried for 4 hours, I'm not even kidding. Call me whatever you want, it is what it is. This is the most cruel fucking thing I have ever experienced. How can this girl be so compassionate for a girl in the exact same situation and then so psychotically evil and cruel to me 15 minutes later. I literally want to kill myself.
I don't have any friends to turn to, I'm totally alone in the world
Not that I have much proof to go off, but as they say projection is admission of guilt. I have noticed some subtle signs though that something isn't quite right. The first thing is she changed the pin code on her phone, which was weird to me. She's had this pin code for many moons, and all of a sudden she just changed it. Not that i ever looked at her phone i just noticed the hand pattern she uses wasn't the same as prior.
The second thing is she used to have me on screensaver, and now its just a regular old standard screensaver. I thought this was interesting, since there wasn't really anything that prompted this change. The icing on the cake that's made me thing something is afuck is that she routinely takes off her wedding ring. She has it off more times than on nowadays. She says its cause it doesn't fit right, but she hasn't taken it to a jeweler or gotten it resized. From what i gather, the ring fits just fine. Then there's the chores, they just arent getting done anymore. It's like this woman has completely given up on anything house or marriage related.
Now personally, women will never in a million years admit to cheating. Even when they tell you they would never cheat on you, they could be getting raw dicked by who knows. Even when caught, they will happily blame you because so is the way of women. But I can't help but notice a pattern here.
The modern day woman has become nothing more than a horridly entitled vapid whore. i've talked to enough, and most of them are super entitled. They want men to orbit and grovel to them. They constantly complain about everything, even though they live the most privileged life in existence. Im sure nobility 200 years ago didn't get treated like they do. As soon as the going gets rough or they have to gasp be held accountable gasp for their own words and actions, they scream oppression.
They are given the privilege to destroy someone's life because they can, and most times there isn't even a reason for it. They do it because they want to save face or cause they think its funny. Anyone who gets in the way will be destroyed in the process. I don't even know how one fixes this issue, what does one do? Where do they turn to? Any man who raises a VALID problem gets immediately dismissed. It's all about her, how she feels, what she needs, what can the man do for HER. Nobody gives a shit about the man.
If I'm not working a day then I sit alone in my house doing fucking nothing. Movies all have race mixing in them. Video games are gay. I already exercise/play sports 1-2 times a day. No women will talk to me. This shit is lame as fuck. I have literally nothing to fucking do.
Its place in line. It looked at me like I was crazy which was a red flag when I walked into the store. I'm thinking why didn't it go on line sooner when the cashier was free all this time? Why did it wait until after I got on line? Shit made no sense. Fucking stupid nigger.
Weakened by the grip of a fever dream called State I will not bend the knee to petty men's tired fate the retread tireless arrogance of simple machinations conscribed and contrived to all of us, prostrate.
neither beg nor bow no more nor grovel will I ounce proclaim the greatness of the bureaucrats or craven mens scheming doubts to shameless manipulate all circumstances to their ill-gotten gain
whatever half-sincere ploys at feigned vain olive branches trample them under foot and make olive oil in the trampling to anoint kings your own cutting branches from the grasping kudzu of lesser men's maniacal ambitions If wishes were horses, if warhorses, wishes.
A sea of clambering clamoring ladder climbers As if ascent from inundated babylon No ark to save them but the people they step on. Let em all drown below.
Let the walls to fall down upon their own inferno Sodom, Gomorrah, Jericho. The storm, the flood, derecho.
Yeah like the ukranian war, where they draft you while walking on the street just bc the traitor president has a deal with some psychopaths elsewhere to launder money, I'm going to @%#&$# the chain of command.
