Washington, DC- Kurt Fellows (67), is being held by the Secret Service at an undisclosed location after a shipment containing close to 1000 previously used sex toys (dildos) arrived at the Whitehouse on Valentine’s Day addressed to President Biden. The letter attached to the shipment said, “Happy Valentine’s Day Sleepy Joe. Since you like to fuck all of us, why don’t you go fuck yourself?”.
While sending an unsolicited shipment of dildos to the President is grounds for arrest, not to mention a possible health concern, the addition of the letter (which for reasons of national security cannot be fully disclosed to the public at this time), put Kurt Fellows at the top of the todo list for the Secret Service. Federal agents went to Kurt Fellows’ Montana ranch and arrested him without incident.
While sending an unsolicited shipment of dildos to the President is grounds for arrest, not to mention a possible health concern, the addition of the letter (which for reasons of national security cannot be fully disclosed to the public at this time), put Kurt Fellows at the top of the todo list for the Secret Service.
Amendment I Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
I can't even laugh at this because the intent behind it is serious and legitimate, precisisely the type of insulting message that government merits today, particularly 1st world (((government)))... everyone who did their virtuous part in the last half century to keep and strengthen the "idea" of God, Family and Country is now a relegated threat all but buried out of site and out of mind...and there's a reason for this, but, just a mere whisper of this reason will rain down the wrath of (((BOLSHEVISM))) on whomever is inevitably unable to maintain their silence...
KVTA4 is a fabricated satirical newspaper and comedy website. KVTA4 uses invented names in all its stories, except in cases when public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental.
The look on this man's face in the mugshot. I know that look. That's someone who has had more than enough. This is killdozer level fed-up. Perhaps even beyond that.
I'm pretty sure the 47% of white house employees were disappointed to learn they couldn't immediately retire to the senate and start a live onlyfans stream.
KVTA4 is a fabricated satirical newspaper and comedy website. KVTA4 uses invented names in all its stories, except in cases when public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental.
Bodily fluids can't be sent via USPS. Sure, it's dried by then (hopefully), but that's probably why sending them is not legal. I highly doubt they were cleaned. Perhaps the package smelled like a fish market.
I would think if it were the mailing, the USPS investigator would be handling this. The secret service deals with other things. Basically a jurisdiction thing. The only jurisdiction the SS has is around the president and currency etc.
[ + ] HowDoYouDoFellowNiggers
[ - ] HowDoYouDoFellowNiggers -3 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:59:42 ago (+0/-3)
[ + ] TomMacdonald
[ - ] TomMacdonald 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:24:45 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] Sector2
[ - ] Sector2 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:46:37 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] TheSimulacra
[ - ] TheSimulacra 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 14:41:24 ago (+1/-0)
Douglas Adams
[ + ] CoronaHoax
[ - ] CoronaHoax 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 14:41:05 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] Indoctrinated_USA
[ - ] Indoctrinated_USA 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 14:51:31 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] Sector2
[ - ] Sector2 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 14:55:39 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] edmundo
[ - ] edmundo 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:08:29 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] RMGoetbbels
[ - ] RMGoetbbels 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 16:41:40 ago (+0/-0)
Amendment I
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
[ + ] Zyklonbeekeeper
[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 17:47:12 ago (+0/-0)
everyone who did their virtuous part in the last half century to keep and strengthen the "idea" of God, Family and Country is now a relegated threat all but buried out of site and out of mind...and there's a reason for this, but, just a mere whisper of this reason will rain down the wrath of (((BOLSHEVISM))) on whomever is inevitably unable to maintain their silence...
[ + ] ilikeskittles
[ - ] ilikeskittles 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 18:28:02 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] Bidenguy666
[ - ] Bidenguy666 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 18:49:48 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] uvulectomy
[ - ] uvulectomy 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 19:19:09 ago (+0/-0)
https://kvta4.com/about-us/
[ + ] dosvydanya_freedomz
[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 20:54:27 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] Neral
[ - ] Neral 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 14:38:21 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] Sleazy
[ - ] Sleazy 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:04:12 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] Jimmycrackerson
[ - ] Jimmycrackerson 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:25:23 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] Clubberlang
[ - ] Clubberlang 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 17:36:23 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] Clubberlang
[ - ] Clubberlang 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 17:38:14 ago (+1/-0)
You cant get anymore American that.
[ + ] UncleDoug
[ - ] UncleDoug 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 18:18:45 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] Fascinus
[ - ] Fascinus 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 21:15:25 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] oyveyo
[ - ] oyveyo 2 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:28:52 ago (+2/-0)
[ + ] TheYiddler
[ - ] TheYiddler 2 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 14:22:59 ago (+2/-0)
[ + ] Anus_Expander
[ - ] Anus_Expander 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:48:44 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] BoozyB
[ - ] BoozyB 2 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:36:40 ago (+2/-0)*
Edit: better yet, we need him as VP.
[ + ] Sleazy
[ - ] Sleazy 2 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:01:57 ago (+2/-0)
[ + ] Belfuro
[ - ] Belfuro 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 17:41:53 ago (+1/-0)
Rules for thee, not for me
[ + ] Sleazy
[ - ] Sleazy 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 17:56:55 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] Belfuro
[ - ] Belfuro 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 18:09:17 ago (+1/-0)
Biden's image was attacked, which is an attack on the very structure of authoritarian USA.
They had to crack down on him for the crime of humiliating an elite
[ + ] Sleazy
[ - ] Sleazy 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 19:11:21 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] Anus_Expander
[ - ] Anus_Expander 2 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:47:39 ago (+2/-0)
[ + ] bobdole9
[ - ] bobdole9 2 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:59:35 ago (+2/-0)
[ + ] observation1
[ - ] observation1 4 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:10:41 ago (+4/-0)
[ + ] CoronaHoax
[ - ] CoronaHoax 3 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 14:42:04 ago (+3/-0)
[ + ] PeckerwoodPerry
[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 6 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:26:36 ago (+6/-0)
How does one aquire a shit load of used dildos?
I am confuse
[ + ] ruck_feddit
[ - ] ruck_feddit 3 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:00:21 ago (+3/-0)
[ + ] InYourFaceNancyGrace
[ - ] InYourFaceNancyGrace 2 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:02:41 ago (+2/-0)
[ + ] Sector2
[ - ] Sector2 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:43:59 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] Had
[ - ] Had 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 16:58:44 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] PeckerwoodPerry
[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 1 point 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 18:15:37 ago (+1/-0)
[ + ] MichelleObamasPenis
[ - ] MichelleObamasPenis 6 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 16:23:08 ago (+6/-0)
[ + ] dosvydanya_freedomz
[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 0 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 20:55:43 ago (+0/-0)
[ + ] AugustineOfHippo2
[ - ] AugustineOfHippo2 14 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:38:03 ago (+14/-0)
WTF? You can't send mail to the pres?
[ + ] bonghits4jeebus
[ - ] bonghits4jeebus 6 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 13:40:45 ago (+6/-0)
[ + ] SilentByAssociation
[ - ] SilentByAssociation 2 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 14:10:55 ago (+2/-0)
[ + ] bonghits4jeebus
[ - ] bonghits4jeebus 4 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 14:12:12 ago (+4/-0)
[ + ] Sleazy
[ - ] Sleazy 3 points 2 monthsMar 7, 2024 15:02:49 ago (+3/-0)