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Dove Soap To Replace Bird Logo With More Body-Positive Manatee

submitted by Clubberlang to FatPeopleHate 8 monthsSep 18, 2023 18:47:37 ago (+19/-0)     (babylonbee.com)

https://babylonbee.com/news/dove-soap-to-replace-bird-logo-with-more-body-positive-manatee/



5 comments block

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[ - ] GreenSaint 1 point 8 monthsSep 18, 2023 21:31:36 ago (+1/-0)

I shot a dove when I was a kid. I felt so bad. I was a kid with a gun so I just wanted to shoot something that moved. As soon as I shot it I regretted it. It’s bouncing around trying to fly. I ran over and grabbed it. It looked at me. A little trickle of blood ran down its chest. Then it died. The worst part was it’s partner came back to the same spot for a week looking for it

[ - ] Clubberlang [op] 0 points 8 monthsSep 18, 2023 22:11:18 ago (+0/-0)

That's a wholesome story to share with the kids around a campfire and a flashlight.

[ - ] Oldmancountry 1 point 8 monthsSep 18, 2023 20:51:17 ago (+1/-0)

Aw shit, let's see her in a bathtub like that Dylan guy. Bet it takes all of 8 cups of water to fill the tub up.

[ - ] Clubberlang [op] 0 points 8 monthsSep 18, 2023 22:12:28 ago (+0/-0)

Sheeeeeeeeeehehehehehehhhiiiit deyt tub gone smell lyke ayyuss and look chaklitmeelk!

[ - ] BulletStopper 0 points 8 monthsSep 19, 2023 01:34:48 ago (+0/-0)*

They just run her though an automated car wash any time the sour milk nigger-stink gets too bad. They just put liquid "Dove" in the soap dispensers.
The brushes and high pressure nozzles can knock of most of the bigger chunks.

And if you select the Premium wax option? She even shines for a bit, before the heat kicks back in and she starts to sweat again.