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Some of y'all poor bastards wanted to see what a 3 year old sausage patty looks like. Spoiler: It looks about like how you'd expect a 3 year old sausage patty to look except, you know, freeze dried.

submitted by totes_magotes to preppers 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 19:53:14 ago (+14/-1)     (u.smutty.horse)

https://u.smutty.horse/mlflmupuxhj.png

The bag is from Harvest Right. 7 mil thickness. More info here: https://harvestright.com/product/50-pack-mylar-bags/

As you can see, March 2nd, 2020 was the freeze dry and package date.

On the left, right out of the bag.

Top right is right out of the boiling water.

Bottom right is with American Cheese, home made mayo, and half a toasted everything bagel.

The sausage, like I said, didn't rehydrate hardly at all and this is not really surprising since it's loaded with grease which repels water.

Normally, when I make this, a fork is enough to cut it. This shit needs a knife.

So... I'm not dead. I didn't get sick.


Mayo recipe, for those interested: https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/159507/whole-egg-mayonnaise/

Protip: Use an immersion blender. As you put the blender into the mix, it goes through and actually causes enough mixing between the oil, egg, and vinegar to work. Foolproof 100% of the time. I cannot say the same about using a regular blender.


15 comments block


[ - ] FacelessOne 2 points 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 20:01:55 ago (+2/-0)

Still looks better than mcgoyalds

[ - ] kammmmak 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 23:14:59 ago (+0/-0)

"mcgoyalds" heehee

[ - ] voatersaredumbasses 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 14, 2023 05:25:52 ago (+0/-0)

I read that as "sausage party" at first and was concerned.

[ - ] Sunman_Omega 1 point 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 20:14:37 ago (+1/-0)

It doesn't look like food. It looks like... something you'd find on a forest floor.

[ - ] Questionable_2 1 point 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 20:00:48 ago (+1/-0)

Just curious how long did you boil it?

[ - ] totes_magotes [op] 1 point 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 20:35:33 ago (+1/-0)

About 5 minutes. Long enough to make sure any botulism was destroyed.

[ - ] Questionable_2 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 20:37:49 ago (+0/-0)

Maybe try boiling for longer? I'm willing to bet that sausage was fine just needed longer to rehydrate.

[ - ] totes_magotes [op] 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 20:44:17 ago (+0/-0)

You're probably right but I'm not terribly fussy about texture or toughness. As long as it's edible, doesn't taste like ass, and is safe, I'll eat it. I spent far too many years being a broke-ass fool struggling to be finicky like that. Eh, I guess my only exception to that is bread. I hate cheap shit bread/buns.

[ - ] lord_nougat 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 20:55:28 ago (+0/-0)

That's a nutrient!

[ - ] RMGoetbbels 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 13, 2023 08:03:40 ago (+0/-0)

I've ate worse. Anything goes down with cold beer....just about.

[ - ] HeyJames 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 13, 2023 00:07:43 ago (+0/-0)

Hilton hotels is interested in buying that for their breakfasts

[ - ] ruck_feddit 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 22:19:01 ago (+0/-0)

It looks just like any sausage patty you'd buy in the freezer section. Sounds like it's about as fun to eat as one of those sausage patties, too. I'd say your experiment was successful.

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 21:13:52 ago (+0/-0)

That is not sausage. That is processed microwave meat. splurge a little on yourself next time and buy REAL sausage

[ - ] lord_nougat 0 points 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 20:54:50 ago (+0/-0)

Less turdlike than expected.

[ - ] shigeridoo -1 points 1.3 yearsJan 12, 2023 20:02:04 ago (+0/-1)

What is this mid shit? There are people on jt eating 100+ y/o MREs.