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18

What did the Atheist say upon dying and meeting God?

submitted by Centaurus to Jokes 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 18:07:26 ago (+19/-1)     (Jokes)

Well I’ll be damned!


26 comments block


[ - ] bl_nk 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 25, 2022 00:05:53 ago (+1/-0)

Seriously ? you have to be under 12 years old to believe in gods, hell, demons.

No one cares , no one's watching your every move, and you're dead when you die, thats it.

Religion is almost worse than wokeism.

[ - ] Clubberlang 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 22:23:42 ago (+1/-0)

👍

[ - ] Not_C 2 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 20:24:43 ago (+2/-0)

Atheist - "So it looks like I'll be spending eternity with the Jews."

God - "And because of their child sacrifices and evil, they have special status in Hell. They'll rule over you."

Atheist - "So it'll be no different than here on Earth."

God - "Here on Earth? No. You died a long time ago. You've been in Hell for quite some time now."

[ - ] Paradoxical003 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 19:29:30 ago (+2/-1)

That's pretty good.

Personally, it's not that bad though.

If the devil and his demons exist that means I get to spend eternity kicking their asses like a space marine or doomguy.

[ - ] PostWallHelena 2 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 21:56:35 ago (+2/-0)

You will have to live with jews and niggers though. Forever.

[ - ] Paradoxical003 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 22:55:13 ago (+1/-0)*

Yet more devils and demons to prey upon.
Am I stuck with them, or are they stuck with me?

[ - ] oyy_veyy_goyy 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 19:45:12 ago (+2/-1)

Not likely to happen because you'll be too busy screaming in pain from the hellfire that burns six gorillion degrees hot. We all will be.

[ - ] Paradoxical003 2 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 21:59:29 ago (+3/-1)

Question, how would I be getting hurt? or experiencing anything at all?

I wouldn't have my nervous system with me, no nerves to sense pain, no pain center to deliver it to, no way to feel heat, or anything at all.

How does the soul experience anything?

How does the soul scream? no vocal chords, no mouth or tongue, nothing to make noise with.

In fact, all the parts of my brain that produces anything that you'd associate with me, like my identity, personality, memories, thoughts, feelings beliefs, opinions, imagination, capacity to sense anything, etc. all that stuff will not be coming with me, it al remains behind with my body, so in what sense is my soul me at all? There wouldn't be anything of myself, nothing, as every trait I have, physical or psychological, all originates from a specific point on my physical body, and all that stays behind when I die. Every part of the mind maps to a part of the brain or other area of the body, after death, that's all a part of my cadaver.

If these mental and physical faculties are somehow being emulated or reproduced in the afterlife, then how come we can lose them in the here and now while we live? Why wouldn't the soul take over from where the physical form is deficient? How could anyone here possibly develop nerve or brain damage?

I want to know the mechanics of the soul and the afterlife more. the soul originally comes from the term for "breath", your spirit is a gas, hence why ghosts were so often characterized either as risen corpses or gaseous beings, in the first, the gas renters the dead body and animates it, or takes the form of how they looked when they died, perhaps because they lingered behind in their cadavers and were somehow molded into that form, in the second, its more upfront, and much of the powers traditionally attributed to ghosts come from this gaseous state of being.

Whatever. surely you've got some answers for me.

[ - ] oyy_veyy_goyy 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 22:35:29 ago (+1/-0)

Who knows really. The only way to find out is to die, but even then it's not really guaranteed that you'll get to see what lies beyond.

[ - ] Paradoxical003 0 points 2.8 yearsAug 25, 2022 10:33:59 ago (+0/-0)

Another thing, at such such high heat, you wouldn't feel anything, because the nerves wouldn't be able to deliver the signals that cause you to experience pain.

That's assuming that the soul works in any way like the body, which is a common assumption.

The Bible seems to operate under these principles.

Let's talk more about the soul for a sec, historical concepts of the soul attribute all manner of psychological traits to the soul, traits we now know originate in different sections in the brain, the Bible view of the soul's functions seems to draw itself from the version of the soul adopted by classical Greek philosophers, psyche, anima, and all that.

But that conception is probably false, as we see in people whove sustained brain damage, or even merely been sufficiently intoxicated, or lost consciousness for a time.

Also heaven is a place you can physically get yourself to, you can be picked up and carried into heaven, climb up there on a ladder, be visited by its residents from the sky, or build a tower to it from stone and clay.

However, as we've seen while flying on a plane, or going going the top of a skyscraper, heaven isn't where the Bible says it is.

We know we've gone to where heaven is, because a plane or skyscraper extends past the level that rainwater comes from, and God is credited with producing rain by opening windows in the firmament.

I see a lot of problems with this model, if he'll is below us, surely the super deep borehole or Marianas trench would have allowed us to encounter it by now.

[ - ] AlexanderMorose13 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 21:56:37 ago (+1/-0)

Space Marines are bitches. In hell, all bets are off. Doomguy always wins because he's insane. In hell, you need to be insane to fight insanity. The real treat is knowing that every civilian in your path should be praising God you haven't ripped their guts open and fed them their intestines.

[ - ] Paradoxical003 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 22:54:13 ago (+1/-0)

The space marines regularly visit hell, they call it the warp, but it is a series of hellish domains filled with devils and demons, and each has a different kind of torture for a different kind of sinner, all of which amount to some kind of ironic punishment, even if the intent is not to punish them, and it is their sins that ultimately bring them to the hell they end up in.

[ - ] AlexanderMorose13 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 23:00:55 ago (+1/-0)

We're also forgetting Berserk, which has the main character dropped into a middle dimension that resembles hell filled with hungry demons who eat every human that has been selected to be "sacrificed" by the Brand of Sacrifice. The protagonist Guts is basically the Japanese God of War Kratos. He killed a whole bunch of demons with nothing but his bare hands, ripping pieces off them and stabbing them with them.

[ - ] deleted 0 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 20:22:18 ago (+0/-0)

deleted

[ - ] Centaurus [op] 0 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 20:23:21 ago (+0/-0)

You would be like a young Chuck Norris, doused in napalm.

[ - ] gaybeeye 0 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 19:22:49 ago (+1/-1)

[ - ] Anus_Expander 0 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 18:57:05 ago (+2/-2)

kys now

[ - ] PostWallHelena 3 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 21:57:47 ago (+3/-0)

If he does that, he will end up in hell with the atheists.

[ - ] sguevar 2 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 22:52:30 ago (+2/-0)

Sodomite atheist triggered... Now this cracked me up.

[ - ] Anus_Expander -1 points 2.8 yearsAug 25, 2022 08:17:27 ago (+0/-1)

triggered? Is that what you call 'triggered', faguette?

[ - ] sguevar 2 points 2.8 yearsAug 25, 2022 08:49:45 ago (+2/-0)

Had to be the chink from poal... why are you here?

[ - ] Anus_Expander 0 points 2.8 yearsAug 25, 2022 13:14:32 ago (+1/-1)

just to irritate you

[ - ] Centaurus [op] 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 19:16:54 ago (+1/-0)

Sorry, can't do it today. I have to be up early in the morning. Get back to me over the weekend.

[ - ] HeyJames 3 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 18:33:19 ago (+5/-2)

He also said "fuck you Christ cuck jew worshippers! Wait why am I falling... it's getting hot... H-H-HELLLLP!"

[ - ] Centaurus [op] 8 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 18:42:18 ago (+8/-0)

All the hot chicks are down there.

[ - ] Peleg 5 points 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 19:17:58 ago (+5/-0)

That was bad.
I'm probably going to tell it.

[ - ] dassar 1 point 2.8 yearsAug 24, 2022 22:40:55 ago (+2/-1)

But not the cool one's ...