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Serious question for Christ-Cucks. Why can't you just summon Jesus like you can Satan? Seems like a Good party trick.

submitted by Master_Foo to Christcucks 1 weekJun 2, 2025 17:04:37 ago (+6/-10)     (Christcucks)



25 comments block

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[ - ] Questionable_2 2 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 17:21:49 ago (+2/-0)

Can you summon satan? Or whatever god you claim?

[ - ] iSnark 2 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 17:39:23 ago (+2/-0)

YES! He opens up his pajama drawer and POOF! like magic, his "god' appears on a pair of under-roos....

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 17:56:22 ago (+0/-0)

Voltron is god?

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 19:41:38 ago (+0/-0)

That'd be fucking cool. Instead of a holy trinity it could be whatever you call 5 in one god. Cintity maybe?

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 20:42:53 ago (+0/-0)

5 robot lions that join together to form the ultimate weapon to defend the universe against space Jews has to be in the top 10 gods at minimum.

Jesus couldn't even defend himself from one temple priest.

I'm pretty sure even @Love240 can't argue against that.

[ - ] Love240 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 20:58:44 ago (+0/-0)

Jesus couldn't even defend himself from one temple priest. I'm pretty sure even @Love240 can't argue against that.

Incorrect, Jesus could do many things, but what he came to do was the will of the Father.

Then said Pilate unto them, Take ye him, and judge him according to your law. The Jews therefore said unto him, It is not lawful for us to put any man to death:

The kikes had Jesus killed because he said he blasphemed, yet they did not stone him under the law, why?

Because he had sinned not and they had no law under which to charge him.

Very specifically they killed him because he spoke the truth and they hated and rejected the truth.

He is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

They rejected the king, that he would then turn to the gentiles as was prophesied.

It must need be that he died for the sins of mankind.

And for this, Glory to God, for by his sacrifice we are saved, those who believe.

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 21:08:32 ago (+0/-0)

How many Jews did Jesus kill?
Voltron killed one each episode.

[ - ] i_scream_trucks 1 point 1 weekJun 2, 2025 21:46:22 ago (+1/-0)

Jesus wasnt a japanese cartoon character.

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 21:56:47 ago (+0/-0)

Jesus was God, right?
So, it should have been trivial for him to kill the Jews, right?

So... How many Jews did Jesus kill?

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] -1 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 17:25:49 ago (+1/-2)

Why would I want to summon Satan?
Seems like a bad idea.
But, I imagine Christ-Cucks would want to summon Jesus just as Satanists want to summon Satan, so, why don't they?

[ - ] iSnark 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 17:41:37 ago (+0/-0)

In addition to Praising God, Through Jesus, for all the Blessings that HE puts into our lives, we also implore Gods' help in times of suffering and trouble!

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 17:52:56 ago (+0/-0)

OK, so why not set up the summoning circle and invite Jesus to Christmas dinner or something?

[ - ] i_scream_trucks 1 point 1 weekJun 2, 2025 21:45:19 ago (+1/-0)

Why cant you summon satan like we can christ?

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 22:04:02 ago (+0/-0)

I'm not interested in summoning Satan.
I want to summon Jesus.

[ - ] FreeinTX 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 21:47:55 ago (+0/-0)

No one is summoning Satan, fool.

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 21:55:11 ago (+0/-0)

[ - ] FreeinTX 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 21:57:40 ago (+0/-0)

Yes. That's really a retarded feminist pagan bish pretending she's a "witch" and cosplaying.

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] -1 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 22:02:48 ago (+0/-1)

Pagans don't care about Satan, he's at least two pantheons over.
The only reason a Pagan would waste his time on Satan is to invite Satan and Jesus both to "Dinner for Schmucks".

So, this chick isn't a Pagan.
She's some sort of Abrahamist.

[ - ] FreeinTX 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 22:37:07 ago (+0/-0)

Maybe reading isn't for you. I said that she is cosplaying and retarded assed feminist pagan bishes have no fucking idea what they believe. All they give a shit about is pissing of their dad but won't stoop to fuckin' niggers.

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 23:01:18 ago (+0/-0)

So, she's a Christ-Cuck pretending to be a Satanist?

OK, can you give an example of a Abrahamist really summoning Satan?
Do Satanists summon Satan?

[ - ] FreeinTX 0 points 1 weekJun 3, 2025 08:44:09 ago (+0/-0)

Nigger, learn to fucking read. NO ONE IS SUMMONING SATAN!

[ - ] FreeinTX 0 points 1 weekJun 3, 2025 08:44:28 ago (+0/-0)

Nigger, learn to fucking read. NO ONE IS SUMMONING SATAN!

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 19:52:30 ago (+0/-0)

Christians do but they don't call it summoning. It's not uncommon for people to invoke Christ, and if they get the desired outcome they attribute it to Jesus. Maybe he doesn't have to show up in person. He's probably super busy and had to find a work around for the whole summoning thing.

[ - ] Master_Foo [op] 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 20:35:37 ago (+0/-0)

But, Satan can possess little girls and everything.
I watched a documentary about it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHnDyOr0DfI

Jesus can't even do that.

[ - ] mahavishnunj 0 points 1 weekJun 2, 2025 18:43:40 ago (+0/-0)

You can, but nobody wants to because you summon jesus and he just bores the shit out of everyone and asks for money. When you summon satan you can bang sluts and do drugs.