☰
×
Login Register an account
Top Submissions Explore Upgoat Search Random Subverse Random Post Colorize! Site Rules Donate
4

Fat dudes on riding mowers look hilarious

submitted by Anus_Expander to whatever 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 09:20:25 ago (+4/-0)     (whatever)

My chunky neighbor thinks 7:45 Sunday mornin is a great time to mow. Maybe if he used a push mower he wouldn't be such a blob. People suck.


18 comments block

sort by: hot new top old low

[ - ] i_scream_trucks 2 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 09:22:52 ago (+2/-0)

like a gorilla fucking a football.

or a chimp fucking a frog

chimps are apparently socially aware and will learn things by observation.

like watching other chimps

or master_foo

[ - ] Anus_Expander [op] 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 09:33:01 ago (+0/-0)

This guy is White, but shaped like potato

[ - ] Gowithit 6 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 09:29:34 ago (+6/-0)

neighbors on lawnmowers are the cities version of roosters. He did his job.

[ - ] Anus_Expander [op] 5 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 09:32:29 ago (+5/-0)

Sunday is, for many people, the one day they sleep in.

[ - ] Gowithit 6 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 09:35:32 ago (+6/-0)

if a lawnmower woke them up they weren't tired enough.

[ - ] Anus_Expander [op] 1 point 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 10:22:24 ago (+1/-0)

Even I am not so selfish as to make noise at 8am on Sunday...and I am VERY selfish.

[ - ] Sector2 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 12:49:32 ago (+0/-0)

Why not sleep in when you need extra sleep?

That said, generating sound waves that encroach onto a neighbors property is a physical attack, and should be treated accordingly.

[ - ] mahavishnunj 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 09:39:33 ago (+0/-0)

Agreed.

My best wakeup was living in the hood in Austin a long time ago. Bottom floor of a 3 floor shithole, but somehow the pigeons on the roof were LOUDER in my apt. The building was amplifying them somehow. So every morning, I boiled water, walked up 3 flights of stairs in my robe, and doused them with it. Simultaneously irritating and satisfying.

[ - ] big_fat_dangus 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 09:58:13 ago (+1/-1)

Lawn boomers get the rope

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 11:05:15 ago (+0/-0)

hey it could be worse. You could live amongst a bunch of niggers or beaners. You got it good right now. Start getting up early, sparkling wiggles.

[ - ] Anus_Expander [op] 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 11:21:05 ago (+0/-0)

I awake before dawn every day, ShartingNiggle.

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 1 point 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 11:24:47 ago (+1/-0)

That's the spirit! Now go out and rake your lawn in your tighty whities ery morning so that your neighbor can see that you are a contributor too.

[ - ] Anus_Expander [op] 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 12:14:11 ago (+0/-0)

lol, I never rake, that is too normie

[ - ] BulletStopper 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 12:37:02 ago (+0/-0)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy6hzspg-Nk

Compare and contrast with this,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytKzWZp__Gs

The oldest known chariots have been found in burial sites of the Sintashta culture in modern-day Chelyabinsk Oblast, Russia, dated to c. 1950–1880 B and are also depicted on cylinder seals from Central Anatolia in Kültepe dated to c. 1900 BC.

And you just KNOW they fucking raced those fuckers.

I would immediately question any man's masculinity that didn't harbor a deep and abiding yearning in his soul to compete by going fast.


[ - ] Anus_Expander [op] 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 12:38:44 ago (+0/-0)

I was a speed demon until last year, when I blew a tranny. You may interpret that however you like. But I drive slower now.

[ - ] BulletStopper 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 12:40:18 ago (+0/-0)

I was just going to assume that was ice cream around your mouth, but okay.

[ - ] Anus_Expander [op] 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 12:44:41 ago (+0/-0)

naw, it was jizz...it always is.

[ - ] xmasskull 0 points 2 monthsApr 6, 2025 15:16:20 ago (+0/-0)

Some well placed rebar spikes will cure this stupidity for a bit.