How do you wipe your bottom? - Upgoat

-4

How do you wipe your bottom?
submitted by paul_neri to Health 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 16:45:26 ago (+3/-7) (Health)

https://www.upgoat.net/viewpost?postid=67ac67b8c6219

Me? I use toilet paper for the "heavy lifting" and when that's done use a wet wipe (disposed in the rubbish not the toilet) or wet toilet paper but after reading the aforementioned article wet wipes are out.

toilet paper

wet wipe

wet toilet paper

bidet

my name is dangus and I don't.

shove your head up your arse

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[ - ] drstrangergov 6 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 16:54:58 ago (+6/-0)

i sneak into your house and use your socks.

[ + ] paul_neri

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 1 point 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 16:57:02 ago (+1/-0)

A refreshingly humorous response from an otherwise dour c..t!

[ + ] drstrangergov

[ - ] drstrangergov 1 point 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 17:11:19 ago (+1/-0)

do you really think you deserve my best, neri?

[ + ] paul_neri

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 23:29:04 ago (+0/-0)

Dude...you're all talk.

[ + ] drstrangergov

[ - ] drstrangergov 2 points 2 monthsFeb 13, 2025 12:56:41 ago (+2/-0)

isnt this talk.lol?

[ + ] paul_neri

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 2 monthsFeb 13, 2025 17:03:32 ago (+0/-0)

I'll pay that.

[ + ] drstrangergov

[ - ] drstrangergov 0 points 2 monthsFeb 13, 2025 20:02:35 ago (+0/-0)

$3.50 is the old rate isnt it? i charge by the wheelbarrow.

[ - ] Anus_Expander 4 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 16:49:05 ago (+5/-1)

EAT SHIT, QUEERI!!

[ - ] xmasskull 3 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 20:31:38 ago (+3/-0)

I scoot my ass around the backyard.

Learned it from my dog.

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 2 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 21:14:38 ago (+2/-0)

one time I had to take an emergency shit while fishing on the river and I wiped me bum wif a rock. It wasn't too bad. You have to be gentle. Don't just fucking caveman it. All the little ants and spiders were jumping off it like "ahhh hell naw, nigga"

[ + ] paul_neri

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 23:33:25 ago (+0/-0)

You want to be careful doing that. Many years ago in Aus a worker in the bush ran out of toilet paper and used grass which unfortunately had twigs in it which injected e-coli into his bloodstream and he died.

[ - ] deleted 2 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 18:44:51 ago (+2/-0)

deleted

[ + ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 21:12:36 ago (+0/-0)

You like to squirt water on your butthole, huh?

[ + ] Deleted

[ - ] deleted 0 points 2 monthsFeb 15, 2025 13:28:28 ago (+0/-0)

deleted

[ + ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 0 points 2 monthsFeb 15, 2025 17:20:19 ago (+0/-0)

You have shitty water dripping off your balls man wtf is wrong with you? Use TP then finish with a wet wipe like a human.

[ + ] Deleted

[ - ] deleted 0 points 2 monthsFeb 15, 2025 21:20:55 ago (+0/-0)

deleted

[ - ] CaptainMongo 1 point 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 17:27:49 ago (+1/-0)

I Was Under The Impression Neri Wiped With His Laptop In The Cellar...

[ + ] paul_neri

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 23:37:23 ago (+0/-0)

In the cellar now, dude.I've tarted it up a bit. Nice and cool. I'd rather be in a room but...you gotta go with the flow!

[ - ] big_fat_dangus 1 point 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 17:20:18 ago (+1/-0)

I use a bidet attached to a bottomless tank of beta orbiter tears. A bit salty but gets the job done.

[ - ] Sector2 1 point 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 16:52:03 ago (+1/-0)

Unless you're using Soviet toilet paper, it disintegrates immediately when wet. Move up one grade to cheap paper napkins, and use soap too.

[ + ] paul_neri

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 2 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 16:58:05 ago (+2/-0)

sounds harsh on the arse!

As Dr Goldstein said in the article: "the skin around the anus is sensitive, and wiping with toilet paper can easily lead to irritation, small tears, and long-term damage.".

[ + ] Cunty

[ - ] Cunty 1 point 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 18:19:11 ago (+1/-0)

A little like some of your posts Queeri!.

[ + ] paul_neri

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 23:29:55 ago (+0/-0)

Reported.

[ + ] Sector2

[ - ] Sector2 1 point 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 19:14:24 ago (+1/-0)

Liquid soap is a lubricant. Plus, 'arse' isn't a thing in America so we're safe. We have anuses here. (as you may have noticed)

[ + ] Reawakened

[ - ] Reawakened 1 point 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 20:20:51 ago (+1/-0)

I don't even have that. All I got is a butt hole.

[ + ] Sector2

[ - ] Sector2 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 20:34:25 ago (+0/-0)

Nice alliteration though.

[ - ] UncleDoug 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 20:08:59 ago (+0/-0)

This is a GAF thread.

[ + ] paul_neri

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 23:35:41 ago (+0/-0)

GAF is a slang for 'house'. GAF stands for 'I don't give a fuck'[Library Service]

I guess @dulcima, who I'm sure has nice, soft bottom, would call it another pansy post!

[ + ] UncleDoug

[ - ] UncleDoug 0 points 2 monthsFeb 13, 2025 00:22:57 ago (+0/-0)

NeoGamingAgeForum

[ + ] UncleDoug

[ - ] UncleDoug 0 points 2 monthsFeb 13, 2025 00:23:14 ago (+0/-0)

NeoGamingAgeForum

[ + ] paul_neri

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 2 monthsFeb 13, 2025 00:56:00 ago (+0/-0)

Yes, well...when you get your first hemorrhoid don't come complaining to us!

[ - ] GuyWhite 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 18:35:36 ago (+0/-0)

I lick

[ - ] Sleazy 0 points 2 monthsFeb 12, 2025 17:35:14 ago (+0/-0)