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16

I AM FUCKING PISSED, THE STEEL FRAME CHAIR I WAS SITTING IN COLLAPSED....

submitted by Zyklonbeekeeper to HDLunited 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 01:58:18 ago (+17/-1)     (HDLunited)

....I feel the damage now, free fall onto one's tailbone rattles the body and jolts the brain, those with exceptionally large brains tend to absorb more shock resulting in a dull throb resonating through the medulla oblongata similar to the blast of energy from a 165grn .30cal rnd.

But I can't believe I've got no pain in the contact area, only shoulder line and up the back of my head.

If not for my oversized brain I never would have been able to read the warning note that the wife left on the seat of the chair that I just took for granted was another warning about being locked out of the house if I don't shower at least once every 2weeks.

Anyways, because of this seismic event and the disruptive imbalance of my neuro sensory patterns I just may have to limit my interactions to include a more brief scaled down post, at least limited to 5,009 words.

I know it's gonna be hard on you guys but please accept my humbled arrogance as somewhat of a disingenuous apology.


43 comments block


[ - ] dirtywhiteboy 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 17:45:52 ago (+1/-0)

fattie

[ - ] SocksOnCats 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 14:19:57 ago (+2/-0)

For mid-range shooting (~300 yards), I prefer the 168gr BTHP match grade rounds. If I'm going long range, I'd go with a 175gr BTHP.

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 16:33:17 ago (+2/-0)

@SocksOnCats ...good rnds in 300WM

[ - ] SocksOnCats 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 18:42:11 ago (+1/-0)

300WM is a fantastic cartridge. Very versatile. But my shoulder (and pocketbook) prefers regular old 308. I figure about 800 yards is good enough for me. Further than that and I'd just sue somebody.

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 0 points 5 monthsNov 21, 2024 06:53:16 ago (+0/-0)

...which is why I reload, I've got a wide range of calibers including .50cal, reloading cuts ammo costs by 70%, probably more now given that I bought bulk supplies of powders, bullets, primers, I've got 60lbs of BMG50 just for my .50 in addition to 500rnds ready to go right now...aside from the .50 I shoot quite a bit with all other calibers, everything is reload for me, matches and exceeds factory ammo

[ - ] SocksOnCats 1 point 5 monthsNov 21, 2024 10:37:19 ago (+1/-0)

Oh sure. I also reload (and load) plenty of cartridges. Have been since I bought my first pistol (a Ruger Super Blackhawk in .44 Magnum) and realized the cost of new ammo (back when I was 21). Started with a Lee hand-loading kit (one of those hammer things) on the advice of an elderly co-worker. Now, some 30+ years on I have all the kit. But somewhere along the way I decided I didn't need to take on new calibers. I just have enough. There are a few I might still go after, .50cal being one of them. Sadly I won't be buying any more toys for about two years. Big life change coming up and I'll have a lot more freedom.

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 1 point 5 monthsNov 21, 2024 18:34:39 ago (+1/-0)

@SocksOnCats ...my first handgun, 1975 was a S&W .38 snubby, POS in the practical sense but within 10ft with a "plus p" rnd it would do the job, in 76 I purchased a
357mag Ruger Black Hawk single action with the inscription "MADE IN THE 200TH YEAR OF AMERICAN LIBERTY 1776-1976....interchangeable 9mm cylinder, still have that along with a "prototype Dan Wesson", 8" vent rib barrel and under shroud....I was married to an American girl from Kalamazoo and was living in the States and my father-in-law was a gun dealer, he was "given" the prototype as a promotional thing, Dan Wesson was the brother to the S&W company...beautiful polished bluing finish, interchangeable barrels, heavy frame and a max load 357rnd, 13grns Unique powder and 158grn Jacket Ball, flat trajectory at 120yrds, I mean flat, sight on target with zero hold-over, double action with smooth trigger reciprocity...THE FUCKING FRAME CRACKED JUST UNDERNEATH THE SIDE DROP CYLINDER, I thought it was an impressive sidearm but there's no way to pack under the armpit without body fatigue in a few hrs, carrying it on the hip, fuck, I needed a shoulder strap to hold the fucking holster up because of the weight. When I brought all this to the attention of my father-in-law so that he could feed back to the Wesson factory, as per condition of the freely, he received word that the revolvers fitted with barrels 6" and over (14") were meant to be supported whether bench shooting or, get this, the hood of a vehicle, ie law enforcement, Dan Wesson was trying to get the contract in Texas for a 5years deal to supply service weapons, Wesson did outfit a number of Dallas detachments with trial weapons but then we never heard any updates...anyways I now have that prototype weapon and I would use it to maybe throw at someone but it's pretty much a useless design...BUT WHAT A BEAUTIFUL POLISHED BLUE FINISH, and Wesson was always known for their polished blue finish...fuck that most of my artillery now is flat black or nickle.

[ - ] namefagsrgay 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 13:09:31 ago (+1/-0)

Big brain and big ass

[ - ] Clubberlang 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 11:58:31 ago (+1/-0)

When's the sequel come put?

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 16:37:15 ago (+1/-0)

Maybe soon, I'm in the other chair right now

[ - ] dulcima 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 10:20:23 ago (+2/-0)

I thought only bears did that.

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 16:41:11 ago (+1/-0)

@dulcima ....and I had 3 cubs pile into this chair earlier ago, for some reason they like getting onto the deck chairs and they probably weakened it with all the wobbly motion

[ - ] PostWallHelena 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 10:14:43 ago (+2/-0)

Sorry you hurt yourself. Your wife sounds awesome/long suffering.

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 16:41:52 ago (+2/-0)

Yeah she's a good woman

[ - ] con77 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 09:56:41 ago (+1/-0)

HA! About a year ago I was pushing a shopping cart through ACE hardware. I put too much weight on it and it shot out from under me like someone pinched a watermelon seed.

I stumbled 3 or 4 steps trying to get my feet under me and went headfirst into a huge display! It hurt a little and I didnt jump right up. The embarrassment was much more painful.

A couple employees and a couple customers ran up to see if I was okay. The employee asked me a couple times if he should call an ambulance. I assured him that I was fine and got to my feet.

Somehow they got my name and phone number. Debit card? THE NEXT DAY THEIR ATTORNEY CALLED ME WANTING TO DISCUSS MY SLIP AND FALL! I told them that I had no intention to sue anybody and to let it go.

They called me again about a week later and then dropped the issue.

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 16:36:01 ago (+1/-0)

@con77...you walked away from an easy 2million $$ and probably a photo op with John Madden

[ - ] con77 1 point 5 monthsNov 21, 2024 08:12:34 ago (+1/-0)

I don't think he's still alive

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 1 point 5 monthsNov 21, 2024 15:50:49 ago (+1/-0)

@con77....hee hee hee hee, that photo op would've required you to join him

[ - ] Not_a_redfugee 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 09:42:03 ago (+1/-0)

Fatass

[ - ] AlexanderMorose13 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 09:41:31 ago (+1/-0)

This post reeks of fat logic...

[ - ] GrayDragon 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 08:22:48 ago (+2/-0)

You pussy. Fight me.

[ - ] con77 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 09:40:09 ago (+1/-0)

YEW GOTTA GO THRU ME FIRST TINHORN!

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 16:30:59 ago (+1/-0)

@GrayDragon...@con77 is locked on and loaded

[ - ] Peleg 3 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 07:21:37 ago (+3/-0)

So you've been "preparing for winter hibernation" along with your bears huh!

[ - ] Anus_Expander 6 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 06:55:58 ago (+6/-0)

LARDASS

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 12:03:03 ago (+2/-0)

Hard hat!! HARD HAT!

[ - ] bobdole9 4 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 06:23:10 ago (+4/-0)

Is this just a shitpost or did you actually fall on your ass?

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 16:29:23 ago (+2/-0)

@bobdole9 ....oh that chair collapsed right from underneath me, 24hrs later I've still got a bit of a headache but last night was a killer, didn't even make an attempt to get out of bed before noon, fucking 9.00am this morning my head weighed a ton so I flopped back onto the pillow and crashed

[ - ] bobdole9 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 16:56:23 ago (+2/-0)

I offer my greatest sympathy for your ass-cussion.

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 17:22:25 ago (+2/-0)

HA

[ - ] ProudRebel 5 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 06:19:53 ago (+5/-0)

The mass of the ass was too great for the chair. Perhaps cut back on the pizza and ice cream for breakfast.

[ - ] kammmmak 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 07:45:56 ago (+2/-0)

"Mass of ass". Good one

[ - ] RobertJHarsh 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 08:33:32 ago (+2/-0)

Mass of ass > strength of the chair per square millimeter is the problem my good OP. You must either reduce the mass of the ass or increase the strength of the chair. Physics.

[ - ] TheBigGuyFromQueens 3 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 05:31:12 ago (+3/-0)

THIS HAPPENED TO ME BUT I FELL FRONTWARD N MY OVERSIZ#ED DICK SAVE ME

[ - ] HeyJames 5 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 05:04:41 ago (+5/-0)

Careful ol timer, these falls get serious the older we get

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 5 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 05:49:59 ago (+5/-0)

@HeyJames .....don't you know it, right now I've got a banging headache....but this afternoon I'm going to grind out the old failed welds and put the MIG to it...just a point of interest, I looked at the welds on the frame and there's very little penetration, all surface bubble gum, poor welds, obviously from an assembly line auto/robotic weld. But I don't think I'll laugh as hard anymore at people who have a chair collapse, fucking landing in the sitting position sucks the big one.

[ - ] clymer 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 04:49:59 ago (+2/-0)

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 2 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 05:37:58 ago (+2/-0)

YUP

[ - ] NoSalvation 6 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 03:34:06 ago (+6/-0)

Tell me how fat you are without telling me how fat you are :D
Kudos for your brain

[ - ] lord_nougat 10 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 03:25:05 ago (+10/-0)

You fat lard!

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper [op] 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 16:23:14 ago (+1/-0)

Me a no fat

[ - ] lord_nougat 1 point 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 20:44:23 ago (+1/-0)

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 4 points 5 monthsNov 20, 2024 02:35:18 ago (+4/-0)

That's fuckin humbling. I've done that before, you go through a lot of emotions in just a couple seconds there. Fear to shock to anger to embarrassment in about ten seconds. Especially when it's well and truly you're own damn fault.