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15

The Ideal Man

submitted by PostWallHelena to NutziAssLickers 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 19:45:34 ago (+20/-5)     (files.catbox.moe)

https://files.catbox.moe/kbvbzc.jpeg

That’s it guys! That’s literally all we want. People think it’s a joke. They shouldn’t. Like a billionaire virgin with his own spaceX fleet who loves Hitler and is super hot but doesn’t know it is sooooo much to ask for! WTF!


46 comments block

sort by: hot new top old low

[ - ] Salacious_Salicylic 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:28:01 ago (+0/-0)

You're being bitchier than usual Helen.

Still not sure why the fuck you're here when there's an entire internet excited to tell you your shitty behavior is "powerful" because the gash betwixt your legs.

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 1 point 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:47:10 ago (+1/-0)

Triggered!!!

[ - ] Trope 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 23:35:03 ago (+0/-0)

I’ll bet he donates blood regularly which is of vital importance to the longevity of any health man.

[ - ] Gowithit 1 point 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:13:27 ago (+1/-0)

not enough cow

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 1 point 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:15:06 ago (+1/-0)

Needs more cowbell?

[ - ] Gowithit 4 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:17:40 ago (+4/-0)

the only requirement is not a Jew not a nigger and have a cow. Anything else is negotiable. I'm not some high maintenance faggot.

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 1 point 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:22:05 ago (+1/-0)

have a cow

Wow you are old school. Go for the guy with the Space X fleet and adamantium skeleton. Be good to yourself gf! You deserve it.

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 1 point 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:30:50 ago (+1/-0)

The cow usually appears after the marriage.

[ - ] Gowithit 2 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:31:47 ago (+2/-0)

2 cows is hot

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:46:25 ago (+0/-0)

I think he means us.

[ - ] bobdole9 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:35:27 ago (+0/-0)

Run away to Wisconsin...your dream man awaits!

[ - ] dingbat 0 points 7 monthsSep 20, 2024 00:56:37 ago (+0/-0)

😂

[ - ] SecretHitler 1 point 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:23:02 ago (+1/-0)

Dang it I knew I shouldn't have lost my virginity :(

[ - ] Not_a_redfugee 3 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 22:04:13 ago (+3/-0)

Haha loser. Mine grows back within 24 hours of any time I have sex. That's what I tell my girlfriend anyways.

[ - ] Gowithit 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:30:24 ago (+0/-0)

its fine. you introduced me to tallow. I'll tell the rest of the women you're useful.

[ - ] SecretHitler 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 21:16:03 ago (+0/-0)

Tell them I have a cow

[ - ] jfroybees 1 point 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:51:31 ago (+1/-0)

Brava, Helena. Brava!

[ - ] NoRefunds 1 point 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 23:47:02 ago (+1/-0)

You know Hugh Jackman IRL actually a homo right?

[ - ] DivineLight2 1 point 7 monthsSep 20, 2024 07:43:46 ago (+1/-0)

You can tell it's a joke post because women want a lot more than this, won't get it and pop pills/wine/cats to cope.

Out of curiosity, why did you choose to be a childless woman?

If you aren't obese, you probably had some soy take a shot at you 10-20 years ago.

If you're lonely there should be some men in their 60s/70s who may be interested.

[ - ] CHIRO 2 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 23:50:23 ago (+2/-0)

Listen queen, you're getting this dad bod and Wendy's take-out and that's it.

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 1 point 7 monthsSep 20, 2024 09:12:31 ago (+1/-0)

IRL dad bods are fine with me. Guys with 8 paks are usually pretty vain and self-cenetered. Thats gonna interfere with their duties to Queen Helena. ;-P

[ - ] bobdole9 3 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 19:48:43 ago (+3/-0)

I'm unsure which part(s) from the other post you're opposed to?

Are you talking about the practical humans or the fundamentalists?

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 8 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 19:56:22 ago (+8/-0)

What are you talking about? I want a billionaire with a ripped bod and an aussie accent. He should have a 140 IQ and he should be a 3 star michelin chef. What?

Many copies of a key will work in the same lock, don’t you see?

I just want a non-cunt bitch who has no tattoos who is Thor from the Marvel movies and has a magic hammer. What part of this post are you opposed to? 🤷🏻‍♀️

[ - ] UncleDoug 4 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:01:23 ago (+4/-0)

Helena BTFO by men having minimum standards like don’t be a cunt or a whore.

Meanwhile the litany of qualifiers women want in men is endless.

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 2 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:05:52 ago (+2/-0)

Yeah but Doug youre a cunt! No offense!

[ - ] NaturalSelectionistWorker 3 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:35:12 ago (+3/-0)

He has an Aussie accent though, and there's an almost 100% overlap between Aussie accents and being a cunt.

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 3 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:41:42 ago (+3/-0)

Gee. Thats true. Even @Cunt has an aussie accent.

I just want a billionaire with an aussie accent who yells “Crikey!!!” in my face as we make love.

[ - ] NaturalSelectionistWorker 3 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 23:15:06 ago (+3/-0)

I'm sure your worn out vag and saggy boobs bring all the billionaires to the yard, but I'm also sure that if you met a billionaire, you'd find something about him to complain about until he gets sick of your shit.

[ - ] UncleDoug 1 point 7 monthsSep 20, 2024 08:57:46 ago (+1/-0)

140 IQ, Aussie Accent, great cook, working on having a billion dollars, only 1 billion short, ticking all of the boxes.
Stay jelly

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 0 points 7 monthsSep 20, 2024 09:14:58 ago (+0/-0)

OMG I love jelly.

What is your body count?

[ - ] Smedleys_Butler 2 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:28:33 ago (+2/-0)

Don't make me send sexy pics. I try to be humble

[ - ] bobdole9 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:34:08 ago (+0/-0)

Back to meme post, my wife thinks I'm handsome, so I should be at least a 5. I can cook, and I'm not a dick all the time. She seems to be happy with that...there's other traits she likes too.

Not certain why you're so wound up on the opinions of the unmarried men. They're preoccupied on some Unicorn instead of finding someone willing to put up with their shit.

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 2 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 21:06:37 ago (+2/-0)

Im just having fun.

[ - ] SecretHitler 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 21:15:08 ago (+0/-0)

Good. I couldn't tell if this was a fun post or an "I'm about to snap on these faggot incels" post

[ - ] Dingo 0 points 7 monthsSep 20, 2024 15:43:35 ago (+0/-0)

I want a ... magic hammer

That's gotta be code for something ... unnatural.

[ - ] Breeder 4 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 19:53:44 ago (+4/-0)

All I have to offer is this monster dong.

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 4 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:03:32 ago (+4/-0)

You think he likes dudes too? Thats what I was afraid of.

Add this to the list: NOT HOMO

And cute little mutton chops like he had in that movie.

And the complete collection of faberge eggs made for the Romonovs between 1885 and 1917.

That’s it.

[ - ] deleted 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 23:12:43 ago (+0/-0)

deleted

[ - ] Spaceman84 4 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 21:34:37 ago (+4/-0)

The actor or the fictional character? I'm pretty sure Hugh Jackman is a fag.

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 21:39:28 ago (+0/-0)

Was there this detailed an inquiry on the nature of the ideal woman anime gal?

[ - ] Spaceman84 0 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 22:24:30 ago (+0/-0)

I would assume there are many infographics on the ideal anime grill.

[ - ] puremadness 1 point 7 monthsSep 20, 2024 04:36:56 ago (+1/-0)

I have attached the requested infografix.

o O o She has holes.

[ - ] Dingo 0 points 7 monthsSep 20, 2024 15:40:35 ago (+0/-0)

I'm pretty sure Hugh Jackman is a fag.

This was also my first thought.

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 6 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:14:23 ago (+6/-0)

Wolverine is like 5'4"

Edit: with boots on...

[ - ] PostWallHelena [op] 4 points 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 20:17:20 ago (+4/-0)

This is what Im talking about. Where do you guys get off not being 6’4”

[ - ] Moravian 1 point 7 monthsSep 19, 2024 21:58:54 ago (+1/-0)

All you get is 3'4"

[ - ] puremadness 0 points 7 monthsSep 20, 2024 04:32:07 ago (+0/-0)

I was just looking at this picture and it says 8-pack but I dont see it.
This is probably just a bad image, but in this image, I'm more ripped than wolverine and I'm not ripped.
I'm not 5' 4 tho lol