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Me after switching to aluminum-free deodorant

submitted by big_fat_dangus to Schizophrenia 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 15:15:12 ago (+13/-1)     (files.catbox.moe)

https://files.catbox.moe/4azbfc.jpg

Get on my level, plebes


33 comments block

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[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 9 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 15:17:25 ago (+9/-0)

You really want to open your mind up? Try washing your nuts with undiluted Dr. Bronners peppermint soap.

[ - ] Fascinus 4 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 15:26:28 ago (+4/-0)

Story time:

Years back, I was discussing something with Mrs. Fascinus in the shower (this is before we had kids).

I was talking to her about something, damned if I can remember what it was now.

Evidently, I was pretty involved in the conversation as she had, during the interval, taken to soaping up my balls with that stuff.

I turned around and rinsed it off, whereupon she dutifully soaped the lads up again. This happened about 3 or 4 times before I was unable to avoid concentrating on the sensation of my balls damn near freezing off of my body.

She found this hilarious, of course.

[ - ] Dingo 2 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:57:46 ago (+2/-0)

She found this hilarious

It's about as hilarious as using tiger balm for lube.

[ - ] Fascinus 2 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 20:14:21 ago (+2/-0)

Sounds about right.

It was pretty horrible, dude.

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:48:51 ago (+1/-0)

It is hilarious.

It only tells you to dilute it half a dozen time on the bottom, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna tolerate a bottle of soap getting all preachy with me.

[ - ] Fascinus 2 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:57:58 ago (+2/-0)

I'll be damned if I'm gonna tolerate a bottle of soap getting all preachy with me.

Have you ever read the bottle?

If you prefer for your soap to avoid preaching, Bronner's might not be for you.

[ - ] big_fat_dangus [op] 3 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 15:38:59 ago (+3/-0)

washing your nuts with anything

It's like this nigga doesn't want to have maximum vril!

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:50:19 ago (+1/-0)

Pheromone maxxing, huh? I could see why you might wanna try that.

[ - ] Kozel 3 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 16:34:38 ago (+3/-0)

Repressed memory unfurled.

[ - ] bobdole9 0 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 18:24:46 ago (+0/-0)

Is that a trick to combat swampass?

[ - ] Fascinus 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 18:50:47 ago (+1/-0)

It would not work. Ask me how I know...

[ - ] bobdole9 0 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:12:44 ago (+0/-0)

Please, do tell!

[ - ] Fascinus 0 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:37:32 ago (+0/-0)

[ - ] bobdole9 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:39:09 ago (+1/-0)

Damn...was hoping for a second story.

Chilly crack would be nice in Georgia summer.

[ - ] Fascinus 2 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:41:47 ago (+2/-0)

Sorry, bro. Once was enough!

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:52:27 ago (+1/-0)

You should definitely try it bro, it totally works. Alternatively you could try boofing ice cubes.

[ - ] deleted 2 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 18:17:39 ago (+2/-0)

deleted

[ - ] big_fat_dangus [op] 0 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:16:27 ago (+0/-0)

I don't know how much validity there is to the whole aluminum thing. For me it's more of a just in case, given they cost about the same.

[ - ] Not_a_redfugee 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 15:56:33 ago (+1/-0)

As kids, me and a couple friends did a dare where we all put icy hot on our balls, and the one to freak out/cry the least won.

[ - ] con77 3 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 16:21:37 ago (+3/-0)

You put it on each other? Like in a circle

[ - ] Fascinus 3 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 18:11:08 ago (+3/-0)

Some dude almost died from doing that.

The stuff they were using had aspirin in it. Sack tissue is thin and absorbs transdermally at approximately 6 times the rate of the skin on your arm, for example.

[ - ] bobdole9 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 18:25:45 ago (+1/-0)

Sack tissue [...] absorbs transdermally at approximately 6 times the rate of the skin on your arm, for example

TIL.

[ - ] big_fat_dangus [op] 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:15:01 ago (+1/-0)

So you're saying I should dunk my balls in vodka.

[ - ] bobdole9 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 19:36:16 ago (+1/-0)

Seems to be less of a hassle than butt chugging the vodka.

[ - ] Fascinus 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 20:03:53 ago (+1/-0)

Here is a video about the kid that almost died after applying icy hot on his balls: https://yewtu.be/watch?v=Le-IKCLGT9A


MP4 mirrors:

https://pomf2.lain.la/f/9impsuwq.mp4
https://cdn.videy.co/OlMv5UWP.mp4

[ - ] bobdole9 1 point 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 20:53:22 ago (+1/-0)

The video sources scrotal skin 42x more absorbent.

[ - ] Fascinus 0 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 20:55:36 ago (+0/-0)

Appreciate the heads-up, bro. Not sure how I ended up remembering that wrong and I appreciate the correction.

[ - ] bobdole9 0 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 21:30:25 ago (+0/-0)

Stupid me thought "all skin was equal"...still learned, and decent video coming from an actual doctor.

[ - ] Peleg 1 point 8 monthsAug 18, 2024 13:38:11 ago (+1/-0)

A goofball that I used to work with was showering with his wife and put Nair on his dick and balls. His cunt wife was as sadistic as @Fascinus' woman. She told him to leave it on for 20 to 30 minutes. It peeled all his hair off of course along with a bunch of layers of his skin! This numbnutts had to go to the emergency room over it. He had 2nd degree burns on his balls. Then he called in to work to tell his department manager that he needed a few days off. His boss made him tell him why he was calling out. Needed to put something on the paperwork. LOL. Of course his boss told all of us! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I know! Hipa laws and sheeeeiit. We had Great fun laughing at at the hairless numbnutts.

[ - ] Fascinus 2 points 8 monthsAug 18, 2024 13:46:13 ago (+2/-0)

His cunt wife was as sadistic as @Fascinus

Just to clarify, she's a very sweet and kind woman. She was young when we got together and full of naughty mischief (which, come to think of it, hasn't abated much over the years).

She wasn't trying to be mean. She was just messing with me, which I happen to appreciate.

20 years later, I can't remember what was so important, but I can remember what my balls felt like :)

[ - ] Fascinus 1 point 8 monthsAug 18, 2024 13:46:55 ago (+1/-0)

GREAT story, BTW.

Bet that guy had a hard time living that down.

[ - ] Peleg 1 point 8 monthsAug 18, 2024 22:45:31 ago (+1/-0)

Yes. I should know about those "sweet and kind" women that are full of naughty mischief. I married one just like that. We've been married for 33 years and a couple hours ago she was squeezing my butt while I was busy and had my hands full.
I don't remember what I was doing at the time but I remember how it felt getting felt up! LOL

[ - ] Stonkmar 0 points 8 monthsAug 17, 2024 18:36:30 ago (+0/-0)

Vicks vapo rub can and has gotten in the wrong place. My sinuses were clear though.