A man went out looking for sea turtle nests on a Florida beach. Instead, he found cocaine bricks worth nearly $1 million - Upgoat

A man went out looking for sea turtle nests on a Florida beach. Instead, he found cocaine bricks worth nearly $1 million
submitted by iSnark to WhiteBoySummer 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:12:52 ago (+23/-0) (www.news4jax.com)
https://www.news4jax.com/news/local/2024/06/21/a-man-went-out-looking-for-sea-turtle-nests-on-a-florida-beach-instead-he-found-nearly-1-million-worth-of-cocaine/

[ - ] Portmanure 7 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:36:31 ago (+7/-0)*

My story is opposite, I went out looking for lunch. I was driving home for a quick lunch break. From an Air Force base. I’m one of the lucky ones, a sandwich and a cold beverage was awaiting. And then, halfway home I saw something that got my attention. What the fuck is that? I stomped on the brakes. That was a turtle. I put the car in reverse and verified that that’s a turtle. In the middle of nowhere standing on two feet. The sidewalk was hot. So yeah, now I have a turtle. When I feed him/her he/she tries to bite me. It’s been 10 years and that turtle just wants to kill me. Red eared slider. Best turtle ever.

[ + ] Sunman_Omega

[ - ] Sunman_Omega 1 point 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:53:39 ago (+1/-0)

Red-eared sliders are mean as fuck; just pure hatred. My brother had one when we were young and it would always try to ravage your fingers if too close. We used to feed it random things like grapes and dead toads and the fucker ate that shit. One day though, we found it upside-down in the aquarium, dead. That turtle's name was "Chet."

[ + ] SumerBreeze

[ - ] SumerBreeze 1 point 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 20:21:44 ago (+1/-0)

Named after Chet Atkins?

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 6 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:20:46 ago (+6/-0)

Square Grouper.

Growing up on the southeast coast of Florida every old hippie had a story about finding a bale of weed that washed up on the beach, sometimes with a kilo of blow wrapped up in the center of it. There's even a bar in the Keys called Square Grouper and it's weed themed.

[ + ] con77

[ - ] con77 3 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 21:40:59 ago (+3/-0)

Key West sucks ass. I'll never go back.

[ + ] PeckerwoodPerry

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 1 point 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 22:36:11 ago (+1/-0)

Islamorada is nice. I don't go much further south than that anymore.

Story time. I took my girlfriend to key west back in the late 90's. We start getting settled into the hotel when we noticed the air conditioner wasn't working. They put us in a new room, get there and take my shirt off and laid on the bed. Instantly I felt something sticking to my back. Sit up and grab it expecting a used condom or something like that but nope. It was eighth of some brick weed in an envelope wrapped up in cling wrap. I think house keeping was slinging pot and left it there for a fellow employee. Weed was alright, but shit was free.

[ + ] bonghits4jeebus

[ - ] bonghits4jeebus 2 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 22:18:26 ago (+2/-0)

I was in jail with a guy who picked up a package that turned out to be bait. At least that's what he said happened

[ + ] iSnark

[ - ] iSnark [op] 1 point 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:42:35 ago (+1/-0)

"Square Grouper" Wow! What bait was HE using?

[ - ] Salacious_Salicylic 5 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:58:13 ago (+5/-0)

Lord Jesus, I see what you are doing in the lives of other people, and I want that for me!

[ - ] PearofAnguishJuniorManager 4 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:55:53 ago (+4/-0)*

I pulled my bike over and entered the forest to take a piss when I was ten. Heard some rustling. A Siamese twin turtle trudged out of the brush. Two adult, fully formed turtles, but their shells were connected along the edge. There was some flex. I bent them a few times and the shell gave way. Set them down and they ran off in different directions.

Got home and told my dad. He said, ‘you know that go-kart you’ve been saving up for? Those connected turtles would have paid for the whole thing.’

Rack focus, as my stupidity dawned on me. That’s my only turtle story…

[ - ] ItsOk2bArian 4 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 21:04:48 ago (+4/-0)

Show of hands, who here would keep it and do something smarter than call the cops?
I personally have never used cocaine and I have no interest in being a drug dealer, but I would never give it to the pigs.
They probably just swapped it out with baking soda and filed paperwork as "destroyed" before they started a new retirement fund

[ - ] con77 2 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 21:38:55 ago (+2/-0)

A guy I knew 30 years ago was out in the Gulf fishing and found 5 keys of coke. He put his girlfriend through college with it. The day she graduated he came home to an empty apartment. She even took his dog and his expensive stereo.

[ - ] Steelerfish 2 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 22:38:42 ago (+2/-0)

Instead, he found cocaine bricks worth nearly $1 million

Instead he ~~found~~ turned in cocaine bricks worth nearly $1 million

[ - ] PotatoWhisperer2 1 point 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:21:47 ago (+1/-0)

And he told the news.

[ + ] PeckerwoodPerry

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 2 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:24:55 ago (+2/-0)

Wonder how much he really found.

[ + ] iSnark

[ - ] iSnark [op] 0 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 19:23:01 ago (+0/-0)

Would have been funny if he would have gotten arrested...

[ - ] shitface9000 0 points 11 monthsJun 25, 2024 22:39:06 ago (+0/-0)

i've got a couple of life stories that parallel this incident

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