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9

I installed a bidet in my bathroom

submitted by con77 to whatever 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 12:41:48 ago (+9/-0)     (whatever)

A package of toilet paper lasts me forever. I only use it to blow my nose.

If I take a particularly oily greasy nasty dump like @PeckerwoodPerry does when he eats too much smoked mullet I tidy up with a baby wipe.

I save a lot of money on toilet paper though.


50 comments block

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[ - ] JustALover 7 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:15:07 ago (+7/-0)

Bidets are the shit. I don't even remember what toilet paper feels against my ass.

You have both hot and cold water for yours, right?

[ - ] con77 [op] 2 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:23:21 ago (+2/-0)

With infrared drying and ultraviolet sanitizer

[ - ] Crackinjokes 5 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:27:55 ago (+5/-0)

Careful with the ultraviolet

If it break apart the DNA of the bacteria it will do the same to your skin and give you butt cancer.

[ - ] PotatoWhisperer2 4 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 14:24:53 ago (+4/-0)

Your skin is specifically made to block sunlight's bullshit as long as it can. A bit of UV on your booty is just fine.

[ - ] con77 [op] 2 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:32:18 ago (+2/-0)

I sunbathe nudes daily

[ - ] JustALover 0 points 11 monthsJun 2, 2024 12:54:25 ago (+0/-0)

Please don't.

[ - ] Nosferatjew 5 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:22:35 ago (+5/-0)

I can reach the sink from the toilet. It ain't a bidet, but my butt is clean...

[ - ] con77 [op] 8 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:23:57 ago (+8/-0)

Muslim style

[ - ] Nosferatjew 4 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:27:30 ago (+4/-0)

lol

[ - ] deleted 1 point 11 monthsJun 2, 2024 11:05:41 ago (+1/-0)

deleted

[ - ] inaminit 0 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 14:24:40 ago (+0/-0)

Um, don't you brush your teeth at that same lavatory?

[ - ] Nosferatjew 2 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 14:28:33 ago (+2/-0)

LET THE RECORD SHOW... no poop touches or goes anywhere near the sink.

[ - ] inaminit 0 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 16:16:00 ago (+0/-0)

Sinks are in the kitchen or laundry-room.... A lavatory is in a bathroom and sometimes in a bedroom too.

[ - ] Nosferatjew 3 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 17:09:36 ago (+3/-0)

Oh wtfever

[ - ] big_fat_dangus -1 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:24:46 ago (+2/-3)

No one cares about your fucking toilet boomer retard.

[ - ] con77 [op] 3 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:33:41 ago (+3/-0)

I have pics of you licking it

[ - ] big_fat_dangus 2 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:37:06 ago (+3/-1)

Lame. Day of the pillow soon

[ - ] con77 [op] 3 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:49:49 ago (+3/-0)

I won't dispatch you that gently

[ - ] observation1 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:27:13 ago (+1/-0)

Japanese style, we presume?

Nice to have during covid but after 1 year, enough piss cakes on between the seams of the seat, you will soon throw the entire thing away.

[ - ] con77 [op] 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:34:56 ago (+1/-0)

You could sharpen a katana on my toilet

[ - ] con77 [op] 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:35:58 ago (+1/-0)

Wtf is a piss cake?

[ - ] observation1 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:37:58 ago (+1/-0)

you'll soon find out

https://files.catbox.moe/sj3gju.jpg

can't clean under there

[ - ] con77 [op] 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:48:38 ago (+1/-0)

Negro please

[ - ] observation1 0 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:55:17 ago (+0/-0)

I thought the same, but you'll miss one day. Or guests will.

Think of it like a trial toilet. One day it will stink so bad you'll toss and opt for the real thing:

https://www.homedepot.com/p/MOEN-2-Series-Elongated-Bidet-Toilet-in-White-ET900/322389204

You've been warned.

[ - ] con77 [op] 0 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 15:09:09 ago (+0/-0)

I'm buying that tonight!

[ - ] observation1 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 16:33:06 ago (+1/-0)

Heavy and takes 2 to install.

[ - ] con77 [op] 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 22:05:58 ago (+1/-0)

Ill pay someone. what am I a heathen

[ - ] PotatoWhisperer2 0 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 14:25:48 ago (+1/-1)

Use a brush.

[ - ] observation1 -1 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 16:31:58 ago (+0/-1)

A magic brush that passes through plastic would be cool. Do the Japanese make it?

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:35:57 ago (+1/-0)

I do like me some smoked mullet.

[ - ] con77 [op] 0 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:37:17 ago (+0/-0)

I knew you would

[ - ] ilikeskittles 0 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 13:56:25 ago (+0/-0)

What did you buy?

[ - ] con77 [op] 0 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 22:16:58 ago (+0/-0)

a 14 yo north korean girl

[ - ] Monica 8 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 14:04:23 ago (+8/-0)

Yup. It's faggot month. Great start. Can't wait for tomorrows musings.

[ - ] watts2db 5 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 16:37:54 ago (+5/-0)

LMAO!!! I’m dying

[ - ] Kozel 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 17:15:12 ago (+1/-0)

There are two types of people: those with shitass and those with a bidet

[ - ] clymer 2 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 18:47:33 ago (+2/-0)

i'll save a few bucks on that install and drag out the harbor freight 1800 psi pressure washer. clean as a whistle

(honestly tho - no toilet paper? don't you need to pat-dry those nether regions before pulling the skivvies back up?)

[ - ] con77 [op] 0 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 22:04:21 ago (+0/-0)

not if youre manly

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 2 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 21:33:20 ago (+2/-0)

You have shitty turd water dripping off your balls and now your balls smell like poop.

[ - ] con77 [op] 1 point 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 22:07:12 ago (+1/-0)

they usually do! tee-hee!

[ - ] GottaGasEmAll 1 point 11 monthsJun 2, 2024 02:09:04 ago (+1/-0)

So hold em up, buttercup

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 1 point 11 monthsJun 2, 2024 11:05:03 ago (+1/-0)

so you want me to hold my balls up while spraying water on my asshole while shitty water droplets spray everywhere? wtf is this? I'll wipe my ass like a man and use a wet wipe to finish.

[ - ] con77 [op] 0 points 11 monthsJun 2, 2024 20:22:24 ago (+0/-0)

Too big

[ - ] Anus_Expander 2 points 11 monthsJun 1, 2024 23:25:48 ago (+2/-0)

I simply use bathtub + wafflestomp method

[ - ] deleted 2 points 11 monthsJun 2, 2024 11:11:14 ago (+2/-0)

deleted

[ - ] observation1 1 point 11 monthsJun 2, 2024 13:55:19 ago (+1/-0)

Urbandictionary.com

[ - ] deleted 1 point 11 monthsJun 3, 2024 09:42:01 ago (+1/-0)

deleted

[ - ] Anus_Expander 1 point 11 monthsJun 2, 2024 14:38:11 ago (+1/-0)

Do I need to joogle that for you?

[ - ] con77 [op] 1 point 11 monthsJun 2, 2024 20:24:34 ago (+1/-0)

Haaaaa!