×
Login Register an account
Top Submissions Explore Upgoat Search Random Subverse Random Post Colorize! Site Rules
1

NIGHT OF THE UNLUCKY COONS AND THE CURSE OF THE PRETZEL

submitted by Zyklonbeekeeper to HDLunited 1 monthApr 1, 2024 05:28:14 ago (+1/-0)     (HDLunited)

I just came in from a night of coon killing and a late night/early morning sauna because I was chilled like a can of Grain Belt beer...BUT...beautiful moon and 3 coons.

Now I'm in bed trying to wind down, I find that reading has a sedating effect, it has something to do with the energy spent in concentrating on the quality content of a subject...BUT...contrary to my elevated IQ level and what I had always assumed, ie the more interesting the reading the more tiring but that isn't so now, it's the boring, bland, shit content, 3/4 of which isn't fit for human consumption that shuts down the human brain...which is why I'm here right now, I need to shut down my oversized brain, and after 15 minutes of encryption decoding I get some of the most perplexing, incomprehensible and simply reprehensible ramblings that could only be matched by a death row nigger as it's being strapped into the electric chair...perfect, I'm crashing with one eyeball closed right now.

Damned if I didn't spill a bag of pretzels in bed. FUCK. It's not just crumbs and pretzel bits that are all over my bed but the large grains of salt are everywhere and it's like laying on sandpaper. Now I'm wound up again and need a stronger sedative, which is why I'm posting rather than just reading (decoding)...but the sedative is kicking in.

Oh yeah, did I mention that I performed a lung operation on 3 coons tonight using only a 22 caliber short?


4 comments block

con77 1 points 1 month ago

You the man!