×
Login Register an account
Top Submissions Explore Upgoat Search Random Subverse Random Post Colorize! Site Rules
14

Implement HTTP+NIGGER, a new protocol modifier I just invented

submitted by SithEmpire to IdeasForTalk 1 monthMar 27, 2024 20:27:34 ago (+15/-1)     (IdeasForTalk)

Inspiration: The +NIGGER license modifier.

Because HTTP can have any custom headers, I figured why let license modifiers have all the fun, go for a protocol modifier!

Clients and servers implementing the HTTP+NIGGER protocol SHOULD include an extra HTTP header called nigger. Because most HTTP hosts don't give a fuck about uppercase and lowercase in the header key name, the case is unspecified.

The header value is also unspecified, but MAY be "NIGGER". If a client uses plain HTTP without the nigger header, the server MAY use the header value "FAGGOT". If a client sets the nigger header value to "N", the server MAY respond with nigger header value "I". Servers are encouraged to implement interesting nigger header responses depending on the client nigger header.

Example client HTTP+NIGGER request headers:
`
GET / HTTP/1.1
Host: www.voat.xyz
Nigger: NIGGER
User-Agent: curl/7.68.0
Accept: /
`

Example server HTTP+NIGGER response headers:
`
HTTP/1.1 200 OK
Date: Thu, 28 Mar 2024 00:00:00 GMT
Vary: Accept-Encoding
Transfer-Encoding: chunked
Nigger: NIGGER
Content-Type: text/html; charset=UTF-8
`

A client may also specify the HTTP+NIGGER protocol explicitly, such as HTTP/1.1+NIGGER, in which case it MUST include a nigger header. A server which receives a HTTP+NIGGER request without a nigger header SHOULD respond with HTTP+NIGGER error 444, which MAY include the text "Did Not Say Nigger".


14 comments block


[ - ] Fascinus 8 points 1 monthMar 27, 2024 20:30:58 ago (+8/-0)

Propose changing error code 444 to "fo fo fo".

[ - ] Fascinus 7 points 1 monthMar 27, 2024 20:32:08 ago (+7/-0)

Servers should listen on port tree-fiddy.

[ - ] Fascinus 6 points 1 monthMar 27, 2024 22:14:18 ago (+6/-0)

All browsers utilizing the +NIGGER protocol extension must, by default, emit a smoke alarm chirp every 30 seconds.

[ - ] v0atmage 3 points 1 monthMar 27, 2024 22:50:38 ago (+3/-0)

I believe that is taken care of in the nigger ping protocol.

[ - ] SithEmpire [op] 1 point 1 monthMar 28, 2024 03:21:02 ago (+1/-0)

That's a great idea! With pings having 40 bytes of padding to make a 64-byte packet, giving it an 8-byte pattern...

ping -p 4e49474745520000 localhost

The result!

[ - ] v0atmage 0 points 4 weeksMar 28, 2024 17:35:46 ago (+0/-0)

Beautiful!

[ - ] Crackinjokes 6 points 1 monthMar 27, 2024 20:54:41 ago (+6/-0)

If response is null or 404 it should say

"dindo nuffin"

[ - ] Fascinus 6 points 1 monthMar 27, 2024 20:34:32 ago (+6/-0)

If client submits value of "Kunta" for Nigger, the server should respond with a corrected value of "Toby".

[ - ] SithEmpire [op] 1 point 1 monthMar 27, 2024 21:00:01 ago (+1/-0)

Oh yeah - better add a server check for nigger: Dial as well

[ - ] lord_nougat 2 points 1 monthMar 27, 2024 20:30:20 ago (+2/-0)

LOL!
Deploying to corporate web servers immediately!!

[ - ] SithEmpire [op] 2 points 1 monthMar 27, 2024 20:40:17 ago (+2/-0)

Go for it, it won't break anything! Actually it might, but unexpected headers are a good test for following HTTP correctly.

[ - ] lord_nougat 3 points 1 monthMar 27, 2024 20:43:29 ago (+3/-0)

Pls hire me after I get fired! Kthx.

[ - ] Prairie 1 point 1 monthMar 28, 2024 04:32:40 ago (+1/-0)

Will this protocol require that Referrer be spelled correctly?

[ - ] SithEmpire [op] 1 point 4 weeksMar 28, 2024 16:14:15 ago (+1/-0)

Not sure, a nigger probably would write it "reefer"...