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12

The impossible burger was the worst idea ever.

submitted by noonefromnowhere to TellUpgoat 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 18:41:45 ago (+12/-0)     (TellUpgoat)

I went out to eat and on the menu was an impossible burger. It was more expensive than the bacon cheeseburger! Who the fuck thought it was a good idea to push an inferior alternative to meat and make it MORE expensive?


30 comments block


[ - ] Jiggggg 11 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 19:05:20 ago (+11/-0)

Remember when an anon figured out that the Impossible factory was across the street from a Planned Parenthood, and then they looked into the ingredients in the burgers and there was some weird shit like the root of some beet that supposedly made the Impossible stuff "bleed" like real meat and people were wondering if they were putting baby parts in the burgers in a subversive attempt to make us all unknowingly commit cannibalism as part of some satanic ritual?

I remember

[ - ] knightwarrior41 5 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 19:06:59 ago (+5/-0)

wtf?!!

[ - ] Jiggggg 3 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 19:24:03 ago (+3/-0)

[ - ] Master_Foo 8 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 19:29:57 ago (+8/-0)

I went down the rabbit hole, maybe a meter at most.
It's worse than that. It's in Oakland. Which means, the fetuses are probably 99% nigger.
They could at least get their fetuses from a place with majority Hispanics. I love Mexican food!

[ - ] Battlefat 6 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 21:17:20 ago (+6/-0)

Oakland

You will eat the nigger and you will be happy

[ - ] Jiggggg 4 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 22:25:28 ago (+4/-0)

ClintEastwoodDisgusted.gif

[ - ] i_scream_trucks 1 point 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 03:44:51 ago (+1/-0)

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeah its not just one planned parenthood near one impossible meat facility...

[ - ] voatersaredumbasses 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 22:51:05 ago (+0/-0)

Retard level

[ - ] Battlefat 4 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 21:23:32 ago (+4/-0)

What does it say about a race of people whose only innovative contribution to mankind is to intentionally fuck up a perfectly good thing, charge more for an inferior product, while falsely promoting it as superior, all while denigrating the original as scourge?

For me, it says all I need to know

[ - ] i_scream_trucks 2 points 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 03:49:13 ago (+2/-0)

gaslighting. so they can quietly drop the distinction between the real and fake meat, probably some legislation somewhere that lets them still keep labels like '100% beef' because it refers to the flavour, silly, dont get so angry about everything until you get a wef conference where someone drops a line like 'yeah mcdonalds in australia actually phased out real beef 2 years ago'

im actually starting to believe both vegan and vegetarianism started off as astroturfing for this bollocks.

[ - ] Steelerfish 4 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 19:15:28 ago (+4/-0)

The perfect shit-show meal would be an impossible burger, a side of Olestra potato chips and either a “new” Coke or a Pepsi clear….

[ - ] noonefromnowhere [op] 7 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 20:46:07 ago (+7/-0)

"It's ok, it's plant-based anal leakage."

[ - ] localsal 2 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 20:27:10 ago (+2/-0)

Solar and wind installations are way more expensive than coal - but the (((governments))) are pushing those 1000% and giving huge subsidies everywhere (except to us peons).

I'm thinking the burgers are targeted toward virtue signalers that will gladly pay for the bragging rights.

[ - ] Master_Foo 2 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 19:25:48 ago (+2/-0)

Nah, the worst idea ever was that time I was bored and stuck my dick in a light socket.

ProTip: Don't stick your dick in a light socket.

[ - ] dalai_llama 3 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 20:59:48 ago (+3/-0)

Light sockets are tiny.

[ - ] PotatoWhisperer 4 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 21:31:09 ago (+4/-0)

thatsthejoke.jpg

[ - ] dalai_llama 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 00:04:26 ago (+0/-0)

You're welcome, then.

[ - ] 2Drunk 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 22:22:44 ago (+0/-0)

Find a lamp and unscrew the light bulb, try it now. Do I have to think of everything?

[ - ] i_scream_trucks 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 03:50:31 ago (+0/-0)

misheard instruction.

cock stuck in ceiling fan.

wat do now?

[ - ] noonefromnowhere [op] 2 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 20:45:31 ago (+2/-0)

Don't tell me what to do!

[ - ] Hoobeejoo 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 01:05:59 ago (+0/-0)

Challenge Accepted!

[ - ] knightwarrior41 2 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 18:59:47 ago (+2/-0)

that's how you reduce your carbon footprint,bigot lol

[ - ] 3Whuurs 1 point 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 02:13:46 ago (+1/-0)

The regressive mindset is to be grateful for NOTHING.
Therefore all change (by them) is progress.
No matter the outcome.

[ - ] dalai_llama 1 point 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 20:57:57 ago (+1/-0)

Well, they did call it impossible to begin with.

[ - ] HelenHighwater 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 09:38:20 ago (+0/-0)

Vegans: "You must not eat anything that is made from animals!"

Vegans: "OMFG!!!! This tastes just like meat! MMMMMM!!!!!!!!"

[ - ] totes_magotes 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 06:46:24 ago (+0/-0)

Capitalism did. If people are willing to pay for it, it will be sold.

You don't have a problem with capitalism, do you?

[ - ] noonefromnowhere [op] 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 06:48:12 ago (+0/-0)

You talk like a fag and your shit's all retarded.

[ - ] totes_magotes 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 17:33:31 ago (+0/-0)

Wow, outing you jews is so fucking easy.

[ - ] noonefromnowhere [op] 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 3, 2022 21:13:47 ago (+0/-0)

You're just mad because you're menstruating.

[ - ] MaryXmas 0 points 2.6 yearsNov 2, 2022 22:05:14 ago (+0/-0)

It was a bankers game from the beginning. They manufactured an expensive "good" tasting burger for vitamin deficient veggies and ran it up the line with vc money. No one ever bothered to read that only 5% of Americans are vegetarian. It was a joke from the start but no-one pulled back because there was too much money to be shuffled.