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19

Oh wayygiee! It's time for some creative writing!

submitted by big_fat_dangus to wagies 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 14:46:29 ago (+20/-1)     (files.catbox.moe)

https://files.catbox.moe/mfenom.jpg



33 comments block

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[ - ] Kozel 13 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:40:36 ago (+13/-0)

The turtle flew. It was purple. Turtles don't fly, said the bigot. Turtle flew on rainbow cloud, it had BLM flag and was transgender. It dropped eggs on Nazi bigot and turned him into drag queen.

[ - ] PostWallHelena 6 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:41:45 ago (+6/-0)

You’re hired!

[ - ] La_Chalupacabra 3 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 18:01:29 ago (+3/-0)

Are you sure this will help us sell more burgers?

[ - ] Clubberlang 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 21:47:33 ago (+0/-0)

Soy brave and enriched! What time of the afternoon do you people start work or even at all?

[ - ] Kozel 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 30, 2022 00:04:17 ago (+0/-0)

like 1pm if nobody bothers me. maybe 12

[ - ] Clubberlang 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 30, 2022 22:40:21 ago (+0/-0)

That's the most diverse and inclusive time to start! I like a person that likes to get up bright and early in the afternoon!

[ - ] Kozel 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 30, 2022 22:50:57 ago (+0/-0)

I put a buffer between waking up and starting work. Kinda shit to get up just to sit down at a computer.

[ - ] JudyStroyer 7 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 16:48:27 ago (+7/-0)

There was a purple flying turtle. It tried to blend in with the normal turtles. The normal turtles could tell this turtle was different because it kept trying to get the other turtles to let the purple flying turtles open central banks and gain the highest ranks of turtle power. The normal turtles kept sayung to the other normal turtles "what the fuck is this long-noses fuck talking about?".
The normal turtles could not understand the concept of what they were trying to do since "we're just turtles, dude".
The normal turtles rounded up all the purple long nosed turtles and put them up against the wall and shot the deceiving bastards because it turns out they were actually gators pretending to be turtles.

[ - ] Kozel 2 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 17:56:30 ago (+2/-0)

that's more than 4-5 sentences so you don't get the job NEXT

[ - ] Clubberlang 1 point 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 21:49:03 ago (+1/-0)

I heard the normal turtles have had to do this 109 times on different lilypads.

[ - ] I_am_baal 6 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:05:43 ago (+6/-0)

The funny thing about this is that an AI can write a reasonably human sounding story, and they're probably trying to filter out spam and retards lol.

[ - ] lord_nougat 5 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:12:47 ago (+5/-0)

Or they're trying to hire this guy

[ - ] Prairie 3 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 17:25:46 ago (+3/-0)

"Let me tell you about my mother..."

[ - ] HeyJames 4 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 16:49:50 ago (+4/-0)

I thank the lord every day that I went to trade school and dropped out of college. Would probably end up on the news after a few months of this.

[ - ] GrayDragon 3 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 16:33:46 ago (+3/-0)

I was asked on a programmer application, "What is our favorite movie?" Not what is my favorite movie, what is their favorite. I figure it might be a real test, and so I searched their website with a search engine. Nothing. I finally put down, "I have no idea." I should have put down "Caligula."

[ - ] SecretHitler 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 16:44:03 ago (+0/-0)

That their tip off that you're probably a good programmer.

[ - ] Weredawg 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 18:01:38 ago (+0/-0)

It was probably this masterpiece:
https://youtu.be/doqFTXrWr4c

[ - ] Clubberlang 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 21:50:21 ago (+0/-0)

Swordfish?

[ - ] bobdole9 3 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:19:15 ago (+3/-0)

Makes sense if you're a writer; anything else, then the job poster can fuck themselves.

[ - ] Gowithit 5 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:36:18 ago (+5/-0)

Years ago I was applying and it asked me if I had ever done meth.

Then I was asked if someone hit me would I fight back or report it to management

Then it asked me if I was currently on meth heroine or ice.

I cautiously kept going until it asked me if I had "beef" with a coworker would I take it into the street after work or if I would handle it on the spot.

This was in California so I don't know what the fuck was going on there.

[ - ] PrincessRobotBubblegum 5 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:45:32 ago (+5/-0)

Sounds like you passed up an opportunity to be a meth-head hitman.

[ - ] Gowithit 4 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:49:06 ago (+4/-0)

It was a factory job.. maybe

[ - ] SecretHitler 5 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 16:46:25 ago (+5/-0)

They weren't actually hiring the manager was just trying to find a better meth dealer.

[ - ] bobdole9 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 17:51:50 ago (+0/-0)

Guess stating it up front puts you in some sort of "special status" if the company hired you...unless you're violent? Dunno...truly hate California...hope to get out soon.

[ - ] Gowithit 1 point 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 18:02:30 ago (+1/-0)

It's been about a little umm 10 years since I left so long enough. Omg I was in Salinas. Mexico pt 2 as I called it.

What's sad is that when I was younger it was nice. Like a really nice place to live.

Went back thinking ok this is where we will live our lives and no. Lasted two years. Schools sucked , I liked how my husband called out one of the teachers by telling her straight to her face they wouldn't have singled out my child if she wasn't white. It was for a helmet violation. He said he pointed to al the other kids that weren't wearing those and asked why did she stop him?

Fucking hero. that bitch teacher already hated me but now she met my husband. I died when he told me.

[ - ] PotatoWhisperer 1 point 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 18:49:20 ago (+1/-0)

What's sad is that when I was younger it was nice. Like a really nice place to live.

Sadly, that's most White areas now. It was nice back when it was nearly all White, now it isn't.

[ - ] Clubberlang 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 21:51:17 ago (+0/-0)

LAPD?

[ - ] v0atmage 3 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:04:04 ago (+3/-0)

probably for a burger flipping job, too.

[ - ] Empire_of_the_Mind 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 19:56:16 ago (+0/-0)

imagine having to read those

[ - ] oyy_veyy_goyy 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 19:03:17 ago (+0/-0)

Well hey, at least this would be a good way to filter out niggers, illiterate spics and the like.

[ - ] albatrosv15 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:58:23 ago (+0/-0)

I would write a story how flying turtles are responsible for the foreskin loss of jewish men. And they are purple, okay? Because jews don't see the colour purple. Evolutionary trait for offensive purposes.

[ - ] IfuckedYerMum 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:48:07 ago (+0/-0)

This needs context. It means literally nothing without it.

[ - ] Gowithit 0 points 1.9 yearsJun 29, 2022 15:12:41 ago (+0/-0)