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Your only problem is that you believe in the psychobabble therapy bullshit.

"I have mental bocks". No you don't. You're interested in your own head. Women are interested in their own self and want you to be too. They're biologically made to be the attractant. Yu ae biologically made to be attracted. Either you are, or you aren't. Climb out of your own head and look at her, and see the parts and pieces. That's all she really requires. When she babbles on verbally about crap you guide her with "subtle" signals of approval or disapproval You guide her, she doesn't guide you.

"I sabotage myself" You're not supposed to be in a relationship with yourself, but the woman you are interacting with.

Women don't like other women, don't be one.

Get yourself straight mentally when you're alone then do the same thing around them

If they're worth a fuck, they'll contour to the man you are not expect you to bend over for them. If you do that they won't respect you.

I would humbly suggest you study and sincerely try to implement, the wisdom of the Stoics.

Try the following...

Consider any problem as your excuse for not achieving.

Think of the goal not the problems.

Pick one of those hot women and pursue her.

Also check if she has mental flaws.

Check her family relationships, career, achievements, successes.

Look at Amber Heard, she's an awful person. There are far better people more worthy of one's time.

what is it about you that makes you high class? what do you think is attracting women to you? money? looks? a nice car?

I deal with something like this too. Only started a few years ago and got real bad past year or so. I even semi-convinced myself that women mostly hated me until I thought back to a bunch of times I was turning them down or ghosting or whatever.

It's the worst with the ones I'm most attracted to, but lately any sign of attraction from them puts my guard up instantly and all of a sudden I'll feel really, really tired and this urgent need to get away from everybody immediately. I think I occasionally misread some flirting as hostility too.

I'm so angry about it but also starting to not even care anymore which I hate even worse. I know it's on me to change this but it's such an involuntary reaction and nothing about it makes sense.

I'm a little relieved to know there's at least someone who described such a similar experience. At least I'm not alone.

Don't settle for mediocre psychos.
Go for the fucking complete psychos , they're more fun ( and psycho )