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I had an HP laptop and an iPad air 1 stolen from me recently. Can anyone think of a way I can track it down or find the person who took it?

submitted by osomperne to AskGoats 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 15:23:49 ago (+6/-0)     (AskGoats)

I reported the serial number of the laptop to the police, and they claim they have a system that actively monitors pawn shops' acquisitions.

I don't have the serial number for the iPad, because i can't find the box at the moment, and it's not showing up in appleid or icloud (neither the location or the serial number). I've yet to try some itunes method of looking it up; fingers crossed. There's supposed to be some spy tool that apple made that allows the ipad to be tracked even when it's off, but the OS might be too old to have that, idk. It was running iOS 12.4.3

I don't think the laptop will be able to be tracked because they'll need to open my account using my password and do something with my google account. And that being said, i don't think they'll even be able to connect to wifi on either device unless they're able to get passed the passwords.

None of the neighbors in the neighborhood where it was stolen know any of the neighbors (seriously, not a single neighbor knows a single one of the other neighbors), so no sleuthing can be done that way.


30 comments block


[ - ] JudyStroyer 10 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 15:33:25 ago (+10/-0)

Are any of those neighbors niggers? I'd start there.

[ - ] osomperne [op] 6 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 15:35:47 ago (+6/-0)

yes.

it was definitely a nigger that stole it. but not enough for a positive ID or anything more than a nigger with medium length hair.

[ - ] Rob3122 11 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 15:46:36 ago (+11/-0)

You should just kill anyone you see that fits the description of "nigger with medium length hair".

You won't get your computers back but think about how many people won't have their computers stolen thanks to you!

[ - ] lord_nougat 2 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 20:06:55 ago (+2/-0)

This sounds like the most reasonable course of action.

[ - ] Systemisgay 5 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 15:46:01 ago (+5/-0)

All apple products are tracked

[ - ] lord_nougat 5 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 15:31:36 ago (+5/-0)

I had an HP laptop. That thing was such a piece of shit from day one, and the warranty covered nothing. I shall buy nothing else from HP.

I /think/ I've heard that ipads can be tracked somehow. I seem to recall someone posting a story about scamming the thief into accidentally letting him steal it back; it might have been one of those BS fishing for upvotes stories, Idunno. It sounds like you kind of have the right idea, but you most likely need the thing's device ID or whatever they call it.

[ - ] JudyStroyer 6 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 15:35:37 ago (+6/-0)

Yup, last hp i bought had windows vista (lol) on it. Within 3 months, the fucking speakers stopped working... I had no recourse for this fucking piece of shit.

[ - ] MaryXmas 1 point 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 17:01:36 ago (+1/-0)

What were you listening to, Beyonce?

[ - ] JudyStroyer 1 point 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 00:27:34 ago (+1/-0)

I cannot recall a track by Slayer with that name, no.

[ - ] i_scream_trucks 0 points 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 07:10:00 ago (+0/-0)

but you do have every slayer track destinys child ever did

[ - ] JudyStroyer 1 point 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 07:15:13 ago (+1/-0)

On vinyl

[ - ] osomperne [op] 3 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 15:37:33 ago (+3/-0)

i think i'm going to plant an old iPhone i have in his car there with all the tracking stuff turned on, and see if they come get it. i'll pay for his window (since they'll surely break his window to get it; might leave the car unlocked, idk. don't want to clue them in that it's a setup).

[ - ] Sh1tt1ngMys3lf 1 point 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 16:18:29 ago (+2/-1)

The only thing HP makes that is good is their laser printers.

[ - ] lord_nougat 3 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 16:33:47 ago (+3/-0)

That's always been the case, but I assumed they must have found a way to fuck even those up by now... glad to hear that I was at least mistaken about that.

Packard should split up with Hewlett and go back to making really really nice cars again.

[ - ] Sh1tt1ngMys3lf 1 point 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 12:58:11 ago (+1/-0)

I just had to purchase one for my work setup. The business laser class you can't go wrong with. Yep. I remember the Packard-Bell days. They were at least decent computers. For HP there is a simple rule... Business class? Then its ok. HP Servers just like their printers are as reliable as fuck. Dell is pure shit. Anything that is consumer grade for HP is trash too.

[ - ] lord_nougat 0 points 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 13:14:53 ago (+0/-0)

I must admit, the HPUX servers I worked with awhile back were pretty nice. Not as nice as what Sun was making still at that point, but nice nonetheless.

I do believe that my first intel clone PC was a Packard Bell. It was their XT Personal Computer, before the 386 [which I built from parts from the local computer show... and was a mind-blowing upgrade! Man, good times!]! That XT had the coolest [and heaviest] case! The front was comprised of hardwood slats; they resembled teak. I gave that thing to the folks; I wonder if they still have it laying around somewhere?

[ - ] oyy_veyy_goyy 0 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 19:23:47 ago (+1/-1)

The globohomo company I work for has some kind of business deal with HP (I think) so most of our computer stuff is from them. They fucking suck. My laptop's keys does weird things. Sometimes I press delete but the letter E is pressed. Sometimes I press SOMETHING but HP's system info screen pops up. And the fans just ramp up randomly, even when absolutely nothing is happening. Yeah I get that it's a workstation laptop but why can't they do cooling right?

They also gave us HP docks for office use, and those are finicky. Some people in the office have gone through multiple of them.

[ - ] lord_nougat 0 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 20:06:06 ago (+0/-0)

Sounds a whole lot like the piece of shit I bought. If I did anything that involved intensive disk IO, that would make it crash consistently as well. I'm going to make that thing a reactive target to serve as an example to the others!

[ - ] MaryXmas 2 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 17:02:09 ago (+2/-0)

If you ordered anything online the serial number might be on the invoice.

[ - ] deleted 2 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 15:40:19 ago (+3/-1)

deleted

[ - ] Sh1tt1ngMys3lf 4 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 16:17:50 ago (+4/-0)

I live in the South so it's nearly 50/50. It's ok though, all the niggers know us white boys carry.

[ - ] lord_nougat 3 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 16:35:12 ago (+3/-0)

They know, and yet they still nig! I guess they just can't help it.

[ - ] Sh1tt1ngMys3lf 1 point 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 12:59:42 ago (+1/-0)

What would a nig do if a nig couldn't nig?

[ - ] lord_nougat 0 points 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 13:17:11 ago (+0/-0)

Man, that's a real pickle! I guess if a nig couldn't nig he'd be forced to *nog* instead!

[ - ] TheViciousMrPim 1 point 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 16:02:57 ago (+1/-0)

What, do you want to thank them?

[ - ] albatrosv15 0 points 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 01:44:25 ago (+0/-0)

Mac addresses, that's what you should search for. If your devices can be still in the area, just do a airodump-ng(linux program) wardrive/cycle/walk. Every device has almost unique mac address, so it would be one day job for a small town. Besides, you would get to know your town/city/neighbours a little bit more.

[ - ] i_scream_trucks 0 points 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 07:11:17 ago (+0/-0)

...

hard to get the MAC from a device you no longer physically have, BUT..... OPs router may have a record of it

[ - ] albatrosv15 0 points 3.0 yearsMay 13, 2022 09:36:21 ago (+0/-0)

Yea i know. I just didn't want to insult op by being a tech illiterate faggot, who doesn't save his devices parameters somewhere separate.

[ - ] 1Icemonkey -1 points 3.0 yearsMay 12, 2022 16:54:54 ago (+1/-2)

So let me get this straight. You slacked off and some nigger stole your shit (probably when you went where niggers are), and now you want help? Kek. Besides, it’s petty theft. Fuck the police, you’re not getting your shit back. Best you can do is kill a nigger, or a family of nigger, or yourself, to feel better.