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What's your opinion a girl who wants to wait until marriage for sex, yet is not a virgin?

submitted by alacrity167 to AskUpgoat 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:18:25 ago (+10/-3)     (AskUpgoat)

The girl I'm talking about has had an abortion too. She started waiting for marriage when she hit 30, now she's 39 and saying that men and women shouldn't even touch each other until marriage. Would you feel ripped off or if she had a good enough personality and you trusted her, would you marry her? Another part of me wonders if she's cool enough to not have kids with her, because she can't have kids at this age, but traditional marriage is FOR kids. So her wishes are contradictory and she just seems damaged. And yes, I'm in my twenties she's in her late 30s so you can make fun of me for that if you want.

I think I'm out of my depth. I told her that and we took distance. But I cried today by myself. She has a genius IQ and she really liked me.

Another fun story she told is that she decided to marry a guy she only dated in a distance relationship. The plan was he would fly over and marry the day after they met. But she called it off on the day of the wedding because she didn't like his attitude.

Edit to the breakup bit:

-she basically denied the reasons I gave saying they are only superficial and could have been negotiated

-She said we should take 3 weeks off and try again

-lol how do I get rid of her




77 comments block


[ - ] stone12345 1 point 3 yearsMay 1, 2022 15:18:30 ago (+1/-0)*

she
is whore
genius iq

kik

Fuck her, and then dump her like the worthless nigger-fucking slut she is.

[ - ] 2Drunk 30 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:36:55 ago (+30/-0)*

That chick has taken it in every hole and just does not want to give it to you. She wants your money/stability nothing more.

Don't be a cuck

[ - ] Monica 6 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 20:01:36 ago (+6/-0)

Also she probably has STDs and doesn't want you to get them until you're married so she can divorce and get paid if you get angry when your dick falls off.

[ - ] MasklessTheGreat 5 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 17:50:17 ago (+6/-1)

This nigga right here said all you need to know. Run from this skank. Remember the Brad Pitt rule.

[ - ] Wahaha 20 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:25:46 ago (+20/-0)

How many red flags do you need to see before you take them seriously? Apparently three aren't enough.

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:15:37 ago (+0/-0)

I’m a noob

[ - ] IfuckedYerMum 19 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:49:48 ago (+19/-0)

If you're not getting laid now, you won't get laid later. She's fucked guys left and right and even had an abortion, yet you come along and SUDDENLY (no, not nine years ago) she's saving herself for marriage? She rode tons of dicks, now she refuses to ride yours. She's looking for a provider, plain and simple. Stay away or enjoy lifelong blue balls and getting divorce raped ten years from now.

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 1 point 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:08:50 ago (+1/-0)

She actually has a wedding dress from the time she dated a guy long distance who she never met and they’d decided to get marrried upon their first meeting.
This was when she was 32. Then she made another ex at the age of 37 wait. Now me. So I’m not the only one. But she has said she cried after giving it up to covert narcissists in the past so this seems like she gave it up for bad boys and now hit the wall and has a new strategy. If she were actually having sex nowadays I would be pissed though.

[ - ] Peleg 3 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 20:58:42 ago (+3/-0)

DUDE!
TYRONE IS BANGING HER EVERY DAY!
SHE IS TELLING YOU NO BECAUSE SHE DON'T WANT YOU TO SMELL TYRONE'S NASTY DICK!
You Cannot be this retarded!

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 03:17:23 ago (+0/-0)

How do you know this?

[ - ] deleted 0 points 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 03:20:56 ago (+0/-0)

deleted

[ - ] IfuckedYerMum 2 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 20:21:32 ago (+2/-0)

lol Christ, dude.

[ - ] KyleIsThisTall 0 points 3 yearsApr 25, 2022 01:59:09 ago (+0/-0)

WTF is wrong with you?

[ - ] GoatsAdvocate 16 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:30:00 ago (+16/-0)

Even if she’s genius iq the kids you would have would still be as retarded as you.

[ - ] IfuckedYerMum 2 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:50:27 ago (+2/-0)

Obviously, she's 39.

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:43:08 ago (+0/-0)

maybe I just like her because she likes me so much. Maybe she likes me so much because I'm her best option right now, at her age of 39. I want to hear from somebody who has experienced something like this, because in the moment with a girl, you don't view her as a statistic, or a roastie, or anything, you're just connecting. I don't want to be blinded by my postive feelings towards her, or my negative feelings from too many redpills.

[ - ] Yargiyankooli 12 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 15:01:40 ago (+12/-0)

She doesn't like you enough to fuck you. How old are you?

[ - ] GoatsAdvocate 6 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 15:33:32 ago (+6/-0)

You’re her best option and she’s your worst option. Or is this your first serious relationship?

Either way don’t rely on internet strangers to give you relationship advice because we don’t know you or her.

[ - ] MaryXmas 1 point 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 17:53:26 ago (+1/-0)

Username checks out.

[ - ] MaryXmas 2 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 17:44:58 ago (+2/-0)

No more Mr. Nice guy and the alpha male bible are both good reads that you should put some time into before you move forward with this empty carton of eggs.

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 27, 2022 20:47:09 ago (+0/-0)

The alpha male bible…got a link to a free version? I can’t find anything good. It seems like an obscure book. There was a lot more ease in finding stuff about no more mr nice guy

[ - ] MaryXmas 0 points 3 yearsApr 27, 2022 21:19:29 ago (+0/-0)

I use the free audio app libby where you can listen to library books.

[ - ] we_kill_creativity 2 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:02:01 ago (+2/-0)

Can you be more specific than "In my 20s"? Like at least give us early or late 20s? The reason I ask is because men hit the wall too, a little later than women, but I'm talking the moment you reach an age where completely legal, completely mature young women think of you as "too old"...Don't waste the time you could be spending with those girls while you still can, by being with a woman that sounds great in many ways, but isn't going to give you kids, and is trying to pretend to be a virgin after she hit the wall hard.

I constantly have cougar types interested in me and, in the right circumstances, sure, sex could happen, but...I'm not, and I mean NEVER, looking to marry them. Not even a general romance, which sounds good when I'm thinking just about the sex, like in a "sexy cougar" type of way...but I have to imagine that the outside the bedroom realities of dealing with a woman in her 40s would get VERY old once the sex fantasy had been checked off the list.

I'm sure she's a great woman, but I've also met great men who made really bad decisions throughout their lives and are lving the only life they'd ever deserve. My best friend is a pretty plain jane woman about 9 years older than me and I wish nothing but the best for her. I care about her more than almost anyone in my life...but I have to admit that the reality for her at best is that she finds a great friend for life guy that marries her and is good to her, but I don't see her ever being a mom, and it's completely her fault and I still love her (as a friend).

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:14:16 ago (+0/-0)

Late twenties, people assume I’m 20-21. I think I should go back to university and see what’s up

[ - ] we_kill_creativity 3 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:21:53 ago (+3/-0)

I think something like that would be wise. I was going to edit my comment above to add "Consider the fact that in 10 years you'll be 37 or something , and she'll be in her 50s going through menopause. You should be playing catch with your son at that age, but instead you'd be dealing with an insane woman." But it sounds like you've gotten some great responses in here.

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 21:15:02 ago (+0/-0)

So the only scenario where you’d stay with a girl like this is amazing personality and helpfulness etc.?

[ - ] we_kill_creativity 0 points 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 08:13:17 ago (+0/-0)

Stay with a girl who's not just 10 years older than me but already in her 40s? That would almost never happen in my book. If she were great, and pretty damn attractive, I might have a casual fling with her once or twice...of a blue moon, and stay friends, that sort of thing, but if I'm thinking marriage and a family, at the age I'm at (early 30s) I'm aiming for 10 years younger than me.

[ - ] Monica 11 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:33:09 ago (+11/-0)

run

[ - ] heraclitus 9 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 16:04:34 ago (+9/-0)

You can do better. Move on. She will turn on you. She is trying to reinvent herself, on your money and time.

[ - ] Shotinthedark 9 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 15:37:11 ago (+9/-0)

Saving yourself for marriage is for young people not 39 year Olds who have already had sex. Someone else said it, she doesn't want to have sex with you. She may feel the same if you get married and then you have a roommate you buy things for.

[ - ] SirNiggsalot 9 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 15:12:40 ago (+9/-0)

Dude , pussy ain't worth dealing with all that.

Find a woman closer to your own age , get married , raise White children.
GET A PRENUP !

YOU'RE WELCOME

[ - ] ruck_feddit 9 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:44:21 ago (+9/-0)

Read what you wrote. That's all you really need to know. You're in your 20s, and there are plenty of options out there without playing Harold and Maude. Run, buddy.

[ - ] MuricaPersonified 9 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:29:14 ago (+9/-0)

No. She's spoiled goods and isn't even letting you check firsthand how spoiled. Would you buy a used car without a test drive? Would you buy steaks with their dates ripped off and hope they're still good?

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 3 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:40:16 ago (+3/-0)

well the concept of no sex until marriage is sound. It's just the idea that that wasn't applied her whole life is suspect. On the one hand, she applied it to her past two or three exes, but on the other, I think she might have only started doing that after 'the Wall'.

[ - ] 1Icemonkey 0 points 3 yearsApr 25, 2022 02:09:22 ago (+0/-0)

Good point. I’ve bought new cars without a test drive, but never a used car without a test drive.

[ - ] Feelslikeclownworld 7 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 16:17:27 ago (+7/-0)

Throwing my hat into the "get out now" camp. just sounds like a really bad deal for you with no tangible long term benefits.

[ - ] FreeinTX 6 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 15:52:32 ago (+6/-0)

Damaged goods. Fuck her sister.

[ - ] BoozyB 6 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:52:44 ago (+6/-0)

Get out now while you can. You're having second thoughts, or you wouldn't be asking for
anonymous advice.
Even if she were banging you three times a day, you can do better. Saying she is damaged goods is a bit of an understatement.
She is the farmer, you are the jackass, and sex is the carrot she is dangling in front of your nose to keep you moving toward what she wants.

[ - ] Zyklonbeekeeper 5 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:28:00 ago (+5/-0)

Wrong site gimpy...Anne Landers doesn't operate out of VOAT.

[ - ] 1Icemonkey 1 point 3 yearsApr 25, 2022 02:03:48 ago (+1/-0)

She’s a cum drunk fuck slut. Pound her holes until they bleed and then dump her. She’s a piece of shit. Treat her accordingly.

Additionally, while pounding her from behind, if she isn’t bucking up to your thrusts just right, a few kidney shots will do. Tightens it right up. Rip her fucking hair out too.

[ - ] account deleted by user 4 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 15:07:43 ago (+5/-1)

account deleted by user

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:11:04 ago (+0/-0)

So she can’t just be a woman who realize her mistakes and has adopted a new way? Maybe you are right though.

[ - ] Wahaha 1 point 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 06:13:08 ago (+1/-0)

She could be, if she was under 25 years of age. Past 29 it's not so much realized, but made to realize. And at that point it is too late. But even if she realized her mistakes at 25, if you're getting a non-virgin, you better get a non-virgin that is a lot younger than you.

[ - ] 1Icemonkey 0 points 3 yearsApr 25, 2022 02:10:55 ago (+0/-0)

When did you know you had found the right man? Do tell.

[ - ] Ozark 4 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:29:32 ago (+4/-0)

I you have to go through hell to make it fit, it probably ain't going to work.

[ - ] Shotinthedark 3 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 15:37:05 ago (+3/-0)

Saving yourself for marriage is for young people not 39 year Olds who have already had sex. Someone else said it, she doesn't want to have sex with you. She may feel the same if you get married and then you have a roommate you buy things for.

[ - ] oursenilepresident 3 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:35:36 ago (+5/-2)

Maybe her BOTTOM SURGERY years ago, is not real enough looking to pass as a real woman?

[ - ] jigganiggaboo 2 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 20:16:48 ago (+2/-0)

Sounds like a waste of time to me she already rode the dick carousel and NOW she wants to wait? Sounds like she is trying to use sex to control men. Plus she murdered her baby because she couldn't resist getting some dick

[ - ] Her0n 2 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:22:16 ago (+2/-0)

Don’t need to read the story.

She’s a slut who isn’t into you, looking for beta bucks without giving you fucks

[ - ] AngryWhiteKeyboardWarrior 1 point 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 05:33:41 ago (+1/-0)

She's either waiting for someone better than you to come along, or she's lost interest in sex and if you try to pursue it, prepare for a sexless relationship.

A lot of women lose a big portion of their sex drive in their late 30's. Believe me, do yourself a favor and find a younger woman.

Ditch her, dude.

[ - ] Redhairin 1 point 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 03:17:45 ago (+1/-0)

Waiting for marriage is likely the worst ploy bitches ever came up with to put the odds in their favor. Suppose you marry the bitch, only to find out she hates sex or is totally frigid? Your options are annulment (requiring very specific grounds to file) or divorce (where divorce-rape and alimony are the norm).

[ - ] albatrosv15 1 point 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 02:55:42 ago (+1/-0)

I have heard about such stories so many times i suspect it's a jewish tactic to demoralize and cuck men at the same time.

[ - ] 3Whuurs 1 point 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 02:36:40 ago (+1/-0)

Seems like a girl who insists on complete control of the ideology, direction, pace and timing of the relationship.
And will end it, or any part of her life she changes her mind about, including her own kid. And happens to changes her mind a lot…

Besides, if she’s not incredibly ashamed of the abortion, and can’t elaborate on the ways she understands it to be wrong, completely on her own, she doesn’t have a conscience anyway.

Isn’t this the same girl that was totally fixated on you mistreating her for it?

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 03:06:14 ago (+0/-0)

Yeah you seem to have pegged her. She said she’s waiting for marriage, then pushed us to see each other more, then pushed me to take her on dates and pay (traditional) and she blocked me for a time because I said the wrong thing which triggered her cPTSD. Damn writing this out sounds bad eh?

Yeah you remember the other thread about this? I should ask her to elaborate on the abortion. She only said she regrets it, and that she was in a different realm.

[ - ] 3Whuurs 0 points 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 23:34:04 ago (+0/-0)

Ya it’s only bad if you’re not learning from it.

I’ve known girls like this, even have a few in my family.
They cannot be led and have to dictate terms of everything while submitting or deferring to you only when it comes time for you to take responsibility for the choices she just made. A constant state of gaslighting where NEVER can the moral spotlight be directly on her.
Can be compared to crying out as they strike you…
“Somehow” they only end up with guys they know they can push around that won’t threaten their leadership.
Then immediately resent you for allowing them to do it.

Seen a video on a huge study done last year that essentially proved women are hard wired to destroy their own sanity and dignity as long as men allow it. It showed as soon as theyre allowed to be promiscuous, they’re unanimously prone to do it more and more progressively, no matter how bad they said the experience was like, and no matter what they said they thought about it morally and no matter how much damage they said it did to their life and relationships. They chose it more and more often.
It’s like women are just as dependant on men to maintain their sexual virtue, as men are on them for child birth.

If your not a fat fuck that can’t get another girlfriend, I’d cut your loses and find one that’ll give you kids without taking them and everything you have if she doesn’t like your attitude.

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 25, 2022 15:53:05 ago (+0/-0)

Yeah it seemed like she was controlling things but saying that I’m the leader the whole time. She would also tell me how I felt about things Ex: You like it! Lol. I’ll try to learn and stay away from 40 year olds.
Another thing she might have been doing is dating multiple people at the same time in order to save time. I don’t like that idea. She calls it quantum dating.

Do you have a link or keyword for that video on the study?

[ - ] 3Whuurs 0 points 3 yearsApr 25, 2022 23:40:39 ago (+0/-0)*

The place I seen it was from a youtuber (channel name) Alexander Grace.
https://youtu.be/VNjoc1aOGK4

Just browsed it again. It’s actually worse then I said.
It was specifically that the more they regretted a sexual act, the more they chose to repeat that action.
Like literal retards programmed to turn into whores wether they like it or not, if we don’t stop them.

[ - ] 3Whuurs 0 points 3 yearsApr 26, 2022 00:04:37 ago (+0/-0)

At the very least, if you know you’re not going to take sound goat advice and leave her. At least prove to the both of you you’re not a total cuck, and shit test the fuck out of her.
Like intentionally shit test her until she leaves you, and see if she comes back on he4 own.
Then at least you’ll both know she doesn’t own you like a pimp.

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 26, 2022 00:32:45 ago (+0/-0)

Ok so I gave her all her shit back and we agreed to take three weeks off so ill see how she reacts to that. I removed the probes she put in my life with her various objects and routines she wanted me to do. How would you next shit test her?

At one time we agreed to be friends to not have any attachments and just be free, but that night she called me and said that I could come take care of a bug in her room, lol. It’s weird - because she does seem like she wants it but this traditional shit is fucking with my head. I’d have to pay for dates until I marry her, all the while not even being allowed to touch each other. But she did touch me a bit when we sat next to each other and said it made her horny. She’s fucking with my head.

I think if we settled on being friends she’ll keep trying to dangle the sex carrot. But maybe I should just shit test her until she gives it up lol. Because women are principled but I have doubts on how strongly they can hold fast to something like that. If she hates sex and is frigid like another commenter suggested she could be like, then I’m fucked.

Maybe she wants a man that can be discreet and outwardly agree to her values but can play the game. I think she is attracted to me, but also wants to stick to her values, she’s basically part of a cult that she is very devoted to (Falun Gong). But again, is this just the spiritual phase that many 30s women go through. Idk, I’m not a woman in her 30s. Anyway, shit test ideas? I want to reverse pimp her

[ - ] 3Whuurs 0 points 3 yearsApr 26, 2022 01:07:40 ago (+0/-0)

Well my idea to shit test her was to piss her off and make her swallow her ego.
I don’t believe women have principles of their own in the moral sense, only in the sense of what secures their support structure.

If you’re already on a break then it’s different. Your only option is to put hurdles in her way she has to jump through.

But all this depends if your just some degenerate trying to get laid, or if you want a productive life.
If you’re the former, then just don’t change anything and enjoy the life you’re destined to live anyway.
If you’re lucky she’s just a hot or cold type and can’t exist without strong direction and will produce it herself if you don’t.

[ - ] KyleIsThisTall 0 points 3 yearsApr 25, 2022 01:58:07 ago (+0/-0)

Dude, she's a useless sack at this point. Why are you thinking with your penis?

[ - ] xenoPsychologist 1 point 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 00:34:21 ago (+1/-0)

if she isnt a virgin she isnt marriage material in the first place.

[ - ] s23erdctfvyg 1 point 3 yearsApr 24, 2022 00:04:29 ago (+1/-0)

She's 39... I'm in my twenties... You can make fun of me for it...

OP I don't make fun of the intellectually disabled. Drop her, you have plenty of time to find someone else.

[ - ] Teefinyomouf 1 point 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 21:16:42 ago (+1/-0)

It's easy to fall for a hot 39-yo women with low bodyfat and 6-pack abs. It's a different look from your typical fertile breeding stock. But dude, they all get old and ugly and fat sooner or later and if they don't they may as well because old is old. The big score is getting kids out of them and having them be a good mother.

[ - ] Psychicrussiaspy 1 point 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 21:15:55 ago (+1/-0)

Bail. Green light to bail. That is all

[ - ] Psychicrussiaspy 1 point 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 21:14:04 ago (+1/-0)

My old lady says that's fucking stupid shit .

[ - ] alacrity167 [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 21:15:16 ago (+0/-0)

Hahaha anymore detail?

[ - ] 3Whuurs 0 points 3 yearsApr 25, 2022 23:54:09 ago (+0/-0)

Don’t let her off so easy.
Ask her to elaborate why, in detail.

[ - ] deleted 1 point 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:23:55 ago (+1/-0)*

deleted

[ - ] 1Icemonkey 0 points 3 yearsApr 25, 2022 02:15:02 ago (+0/-0)

A woman in graduate school wants a career, not a family.

[ - ] deleted 0 points 3 yearsApr 26, 2022 21:52:20 ago (+0/-0)

deleted

[ - ] totes_magotes 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 19:59:16 ago (+0/-0)

That means she doesn't wnt to fuck you.

[ - ] dalai_llama 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 19:24:45 ago (+0/-0)

You would have to be a complete fucking retard to go for a girl like that.

You're the perfect match.

[ - ] con77 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:49:42 ago (+0/-0)

shes an idiot. get away

[ - ] diggernicks 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 16:21:05 ago (+2/-2)

can't have kids at this age

Are you retarded nigger?

My sister had a baby at 39

[ - ] shitface9000 2 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 17:44:28 ago (+2/-0)

Risks go way up

[ - ] diggernicks 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 18:16:44 ago (+0/-0)

maybe if said woman takes shitty care of her body does tons of drugs and/or drinks and smokes

If she does take good care of herself theres no need to worry

[ - ] gaybeeye 0 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 14:24:24 ago (+0/-0)

[ - ] Laputois -1 points 3 yearsApr 23, 2022 21:33:37 ago (+0/-1)

Dude you are dating a tranny. That is why he (it) won't show you the goods or a good time.