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44

A terrifying thought.

submitted by Splooge to whatever 2.8 yearsAug 5, 2021 04:24:08 ago (+44/-0)     (whatever)

DEAR [FIRST NAME],

THANK YOU FOR BEING A VALUED CUSTOMER AT [REDACTED] BANK.

WE REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT IN COMPLIANCE WITH THE HEALTH AND SAFETY ACT OF 2022, THE FOLLOWING ACCOUNTS WILL BE SUSPENDED INDEFINITELY:

CHECKING: XXXX-XXXX-XXXX-4699
SAVINGS: XXXX-XXXX-XXXX-7369

FUNDS IN THE ABOVE LISTED ACCOUNT(S) WILL BE INACCESSIBLE UNTIL VALID PROOF OF VACCINATION HAS BEEN PROVIDED AT ANY OF OUR CONVENIENT LOCATIONS. PLEASE VISIT OUR WEBSITE FOR THE NEAREST VERIFICATION-READY CENTER NEAR YOU.

WE APOLOGIZE FOR ANY INCONVENIENCE THIS MAY CAUSE AND APPRECIATE YOUR UNDERSTANDING. THANK YOU FOR BEING A VALUED CUSTOMER.

SINCERELY,
ARI GOLDMAN
BRANCH MANAGER, [REDACTED] BANK


44 comments block

out -2 points 2.8 years ago

The answer is simple, but whenever someone says "crypto", all the room-temperature IQ NPC's REEEEEE because they're technically incompetent.